A 2021 study by the Census revealed that childless adults age 55 and older had a median net worth of $153,900 compared to $130,400 for biological parents.
people used to look at children as a way to pass on knowledge, culture, adn ofc, genes
nowadays our genes dont matter so much unless youre a super athlete or mega genius, so passing them on seems frivolous to many. then theres the interent, which houses knowledge on damn near everything. so i guess it makes sense why the desire to carry on would be outweighed at this point
Honestly at this point there are only a handful of headlines that cover about 90% of news stories:
-Young people 'choose' lifestyle choice that was forced upon them by external conditions.
-Young people are 'killing industry' that they are not paid enough to even dream of participating in.
-Rich person/people found guilty of or admitted to enormous crime will go unpunished.
-Someones totally unqualified opinion on a subject that we're reporting as news because they're rich.
-World ending, shareholders rejoice.
FDR taxes the shit out of rich people so they had to re-invest the money into their companies or lose it to the government. That built a strong, industrialized America with good paying jobs. Ronald Reagan reversed everything and we've been in decline ever since. Still a huge number of poor people continue to vote Republican, against their country, and their own interests.
Choosing to not have children is becoming more and more accepted among younger people for a long variety of reasons, among them being climate and economy as well as "not going to ruin my body" and "well i just dont like children"
You pretty much nailed the entire reason for most of my friends and myself (mid to late 20s). We can all afford kids, but it's just not something anyone desires except for one or two people in our group of 14.
Most of us don't even dislike kids, but the thought of having our own is undesirable.
Neither, really. More like are choosing not to go into child debt. Having a kid costs more than having a house. Good for this generation for taking control of their reproductive decisions.
Of all my younger siblings/cousins/etc, the only ones with kids were accidents. Only I chose to purposely start a family, and that took me a decade of saving.
You can both be right, you know. Many of us also agree with what this person was saying.
I used to want kids. I will refuse to have kids unless I can afford them, and until I can GUARANTEE that their human rights won't be stripped away by the whims of stupid people who are completely disconnected from reality. I won't bring a new life into a world that's rushing towards climate oblivion, either.
I'll sterilize myself before I'm ever forced to have kids.
Agreed. These people are trying to leverage something many of us absolutely aren't interested in to push for necessities such as fixing inflation, universal Healthcare etc. Except that if those things were fixed it wouldn't change the birth rate much at all. That's why Republicans are forcing people to be breeding machines. Educated well off people know better to engage in an activity that is detrimental to their physical and mental health. And making a human means you're responsible for them until you or they die. That's the biggest mistake people make. They make a human, then wash their hands of then.
If having kids causes you to be poorer what would the results look like?
The reality is that the more kids you have the worse you are at capitalism: You can't work as much, you can't take on more demanding jobs and you'll make life choices that are less lucrative to care for the kids.
The source you linked tells that more developed countries have less kids, which is almost unrelated to how "affordable" having a child is, which infact have the opposite trend.
No one should have a child unless they are willing to commit themselves to that child 100%. I have a daughter. She's the most wonderful thing that ever happened to me. And if anyone willingly took substantially less effort than I've taken to try to raise her in a safe, healthy environment and prepare her for her future as best I can- fuck you, you should have worn a fucking condom.
Interesting/sad how simply due to circumstance, somebody’s absolute honest best at max effort/sacrifice can still be raising a kid in a favela.
Consider the top vs. bottom billion: I expect the latter half’s kids would appear neglected if they were suddenly transported to the former’s McMansions overnight.
That’s not to say the kisses and the love are any less, but the clothes and the education and the soccer practice? I’d bet certainly.
I hope within by two generations from now this kind of pondering is only possible from a historical perspective. The kids deserve it.
I also have kids and love them dearly. However I think that it is important that parents have their own interests and time for their own lives, independent of their roles as parents. Of course with very young children there's barely time to sleep, but humans grow up quickly! 😄
I make ~$200K a year. As a father of 5, I wish I had not had a single one. I love them, but the stress of taking care of them coupled with the future of the planet makes me regret life choices.
I find it interesting that you cite the stress of raising them as a factor in your regret. Could you not tell that was going to be an issue around the time number three came around? That's not intended to be accusatory btw. I'm genuinely curious.
Not OP, but I've found that the older they get, the harder it gets. Schedules are all over the place, and they start advocating for things they want to do that don't fit neatly into the family calendar (vs when you were able to choose everything for them).
Expectations for parents have also skyrocketed. Your "best" now is far different than what the 1990s parents were expected to deliver. And, of course, you love them and want to provide them everything they need, so you bend over backwards to make it happen. That's what society demands, too.
I don't have as many kids as OP, and I can't fucking imagine wrangling five in the current world...😳
Maybe they meant it like “there is now stress for helping pay for college at a higher cost than when they were born.” Or being stressed knowing if the family lives in a HCOL area (typically where those salaries are offered), they might not be able to live there as well with the current trends in housing costs.
TLDR: things have changed for the worst for newer generations, parents can see it.
My wife finally are in a point where we can afford to have children, but we are kinda getting a bit old to have children. So we are also choosing the dual income no children life style,
But a big part of that is our age and how long it took to get to a comfortable place financially.
Now we want to focus on saving for a house and retirement.
“When we advise clients about having children, we honestly don’t even give them the full real details and the real numbers,” said Shannon McLay, founder of The Financial Gym. “It’s one of those things if you see the math of it all, it might make you decide to not have children.”
what a whole generation of pulling the ladder up behind you will do to a society. Party of family values doing everything they possibly can to destroy familes.
Holy shit, what an incredibly unethical thing to do. "We're lying to the people who come to us for advice because if we told the truth they might make a decision we don't like."
Because we can't afford our own lives, how are we supposed to support children? Not even taking into account for how absolutely fucked we all are. Our planet is dying, how can we bring children into this world if it's all falling apart?
I mean a lot of us wouldn't even if it they paid us. We finally live in a time where we know better and can choose not to be barefoot and pregnant (unless you live in tx).
My parents set the house on fire, I'm looking for a fire extinguisher, and some newsie wants me to know that if I just had kids they could grow up to be firemen.
What an asshole thing to do. Hey we had fun using up this planet now here, we made you to clean up up the mess. That's what AI and robots are for. Not humans.
Man, fuck them negative votes. Humans do best understand pressure. We need humans to solve this crisis because, humans manufactured it. We make more humans and roll the dice.
I make the same number as my dad used to. His was a different currency but the number was the same which makes it awfully simple to put everything into perspective.
His house: 350
Mine: a little under half the size: 900
I'm already down 550 in comparison.
His insurance: 90
Mine: 160
I'm down 620.
His medicine cost and doctor visits: basically zero.
Mine: 385 and half the medicine comes out of pocket nowadays.
This difference is hard to put into perspectice as the 385 is once a year and medicine depends on the situation.
Him: unemployed wife, groceries cost about 200 for a full month, owns a car and has 4 children.
Me: wife works and has a hobby that makes money, no car because no money left. Groceries: we eat about 2/3rd of what they did and pay 200 a week. No children.
We are down 1220 if we forget about insurance and medicine. I don't make 1220 more than he did.
Fuck this hellhole, you stole our life and i hope there is a hell for you scumbags.
Don't blame your dad - however much you resent him it's not like he has any influence over the economy. Instead blame the super rich who have real influence and are actively pushing policy to widen this social divide.
But it is partially their fault: they have the largest political clout by generation so welfare and zoning policies have always suited them at the behest of everyone else.
And even if people don't have kids, the rich aren't going to be impacted. They just use immigration as a stop gap until everything is automated away and we see wealth imbalance get taken to 11. I'm talking gated communities everywhere with poverty in-between (e.g
South Africa)
Gee, it's almost like it's important for the long term success of society to have systems in place that make sure it's not a burden to create new people to take over for your generation after their bodies are too old and broken to keep working and society functioning.
Then again, the decisions have already been made by the people with the power to make them, and technology/automation are in line to replace workers. They'll be a little loud and problematic until the numbers naturally even themselves out, but we'll be left with an enlightened society of capitalist asset owners being supported by a massive technological network.
The plebs aren't breeding enough future workers for us to exploit to deliver the promised renumerations to our shareholders.
We MUST find out the reason why! No it can't possibly be that extracting all the wealth into our dragon hoards, I mean, hedge funds is the reason why they're too broke to support children.
It can only be a LiFeStYlE cHoICe!
Like being homeless or poor.
Because those dots are countries (with vastly different social and economic structures) not people. The people in the lower-income countries probably don't depend on money in their lives as much as people in richer countries do. Your source also lists other reasons.
Also I'd say go back in time here in the US and you'd see something similar here with farm families, but that makes less sense now when land/housing is expensive and giant expensive machinery (that you probably wouldn't trust anybody else with) does much of the work. That and 100 other factors that make it not work like that.
This is copy paste from your replies elsewhere in the thread. F-off with your purposefully misleading comment. That just says more developed countries have less kids, which we know. That has nothing to do with internal trends.
Friend of mine wanted kids. Can't afford it. Both her and her partner work full time, though money was too tight for them to feel comfortable. It's heartbreaking, really.
Quick math suggests that it takes about 2190 bananas to raise a child, with an average of 1 banana every 3 days.
This cost does not incluce therapy sessions for the parents though, so is not a complete breakdown of the cost of raising a child.
As I remember it: fundamentalists are repopulating the earth, and overall population will drop off before long, so don’t mind having & raising progress young minds.
Im a DINK! Just this year we bought a house, vacationed in Europe and are installing a new heat pump system. I interact with my friends kids and have nieces and nephews. I get to be the fun one and if someone poops or gets sick I can return them. It's like skipping right to the grandparent stage. I don't hate kids or look down on parents like some child free communities but I don't envy them at all. I totally get why DINKness is on the rise. Hopefully the stigma reduces as it become more common.
Not as bad as you would think. I am lucky to live in a very progressive state that is investing heavily in green technology. The state gave us a .99 percent loan we have sitting in a high percent saving account to withdraw payments from. The state also gave us like 6k is rebates just to get rid of our old Freon unit. We are hoping to cut our energy bills in half. So depending on where you live you should look into it.
Me too, kids made my life so much better, but oof I hate when people push their lifestyle on others, child free and natalist proselytizers can both fuck off. We aren't going to run out of people, or get too many, you can see it adjusting even now. It seems so normal for people in a crowded world to want fewer kids, and slow birth rate is so much nicer than war or plague as a way to control population.
Because life is and will continue to be pretty good for a lot of people. I definitely think it will be for my kid. Also, Idiocracy. If all the good, thoughtful people take your attitude then every human will be an idiot or asshole, which is an utterly hopeless future. I get that hopelessness. I felt more or less as you do for a while. But there a good, noble reasons to have a family. It's not so cut and dry.
Honestly yeah. I think a lot of these articles assume the "Move out on their 18th birthday" mentality, but I see extended family situations increasing because livability sure isn't.
If we raised our families in this cooperative fashion, even when the kids are adults, I feel like we'd be much closer to the stable "nuclear family" model than previous generations ever were, relying on a single generation's "breadwinner" and everyone else just being immediate dependents.
Instead of "paying rent", everyone contributes to the household's common good by covering portions of utilities and such.
I dunno maybe this just works for us because nobody in the house is "Boomer with a firm handshake" rich. But it works lol.
"But we need your children to grow up and produce product and more children so that we can continue the cycle of funneling the value they create into the pockets of our society's most wealthy and well connected!"
Guess the crazed business owners should have paid more money to their lowly drones (who actually do all of the work) instead of taking larger and larger massive bonuses for themselves then.
I was lucky to get sterilized in Tennessee (pre RvW), and I'm absolutely hyped about it. I never felt maternal, and the feeling disappeared even more as I heard the 'discussions' about women's 'rights'. The more I was made to feel like a next gen's workforce factory , the more I realized a life of free time and savings was much more desirable.
This is similar to the "correlation doesn't equal causation" fallacy.
Dual income and no kids, is due to the prospect of cost of living and raising a family out pacing income. Housing, vehicle, child care, tuition, are all the items pricing middle class out of options.
DINK is not a choice, if anything, it's more the result of not having the luxury to choose.
I think there's a very solid argument to be made that far fewer would be making that choice if the future didn't look bleak as hell. I would at least consider having kids if I thought there was a better than not chance that the world I leave them will be better than the one I was given.
Exactly. People need to stop acting like the economy is stopping them from making the biggest mistake of their lives. This is the ONLY good thing about the economy right now.
This is a gross oversimplification that ignores a million societal factors. It's a choice for a lot of us. People used to either not have a choice or think they didn't. Many now know they have a choice and don't want to be broke and stressed. Like my parents were. You know, back when everyone was rich and happy.
I very much enjoy the lifestyle that comes with it. It's less stress overall. And it's not exactly a fun place (current state of the world) for me to want to bring a mini me into.
This actually was a choice that my partner and I discussed before we got married. I have lived a charmed life but my mental health still is not great despite that; hard to justify creating another version of myself whose life experiences are fairly likely to be worse than mine.
Additionally my brother-in-law requires additional support. He's an adult with learning difficulties and is unable to work. Eventually he'll need to come and live with us once old relatives have passed away.
My father was infertile but they elected to go for a sperm donor so that I would have the option to choose whether I wanted to have kids of my own. In theory they could have made me with IVF but I would have likely been infertile too. I hope I'm not letting him down but I remind myself that he was giving me the option to choose as opposed to some kind of mandate to procreate.
Single income supporting a family of 4 here, and it's the best life I could realistically imagine. I live in a low cost of living area and make enough money that we all live comfortably. Kids are getting everything they want for Christmas.
I am a father. If you don't want kids please please don't have them. Whatever residual guilt or obligation you are operating under I ask you to purge from your system. The world has enough problems without bringing kids into it that you don't want to raise. Being a parent is hard enough for people like me who want and continue to want to do it, I can't imagine how much worse it will be for a person who doesn't or didn't want.
Yes it is true to one extent almost all parents are rising to the occasion. No one is fully ready and there is never a perfect time. But this is a retrocon. Just because you can figure out something and muddle through doesn't mean you should have to be in that position to begin with.
Again please please do not reproduce if you are unwilling or unable to raise those kids. Leave the task to people who want to. If you still feel some guilt, for whatever reason, go look at some parent in your life and offer to help them with any little task. Even if it is just sitting on their couch playing with your cellphone while they can run out and buy groceries.
I always feel cheated as an asexual/aromantic person. We shouldn't be forced to live with roommates for the rest of our lives just because we don't want to get married, which isn't really a choice, it's just our orientation like anyone else's. It's also so much harder when neurodivergence and/or social anxiety is an issue.
No one should be forced to get married or have roommates (or both) just to keep a roof over their heads. Everyone is entitled to have a little bit of privacy and comfort in their lives, especially if they work hard for it.
I can't believe I feel like I have to justify the desire for a studio apartment with no roommates.
Amen, AroAce SINK, with no partner to pick up any slack...I'm lucky currently to live with family that I get along well with, but they're older and not in great health, so that's not going to last forever.
Natural selection, the process by which the strongest, the smartest
the fastest reproduced in greater numbers than the rest,
That is a misunderstanding of natural selection. Natural selection means the most efficient ways to live in your ecological niche have been selected for.
Sloths are not counter to natural selection. They're not fast or smart or strong. What they are is well-adapted to live in their environment.
My sister in law would like to be made infertile as well, unfortunately no doctor will do it for her because her hypothetical husband might want children from her one day. Being female in America and not wanting kids is heavily stigmatized, in her case she just doesn’t like them
Say what you will about previous generations but the ilk of Brian cheskey leading the way for destitution know money hoarding from unchecked capitalism more efficiently than ever before.
The US only has a positive birth rate because of immigration. It probably won't be that long before we in the US follow Japan's example and offer incentives for people to be parents. After all, if the R's are feeling more that the "immigration is poisoning the blood of our nation and D's are in favor of helping young people have kids, everything is in alignment for that to work.
There is. Not sure why advocating for eugenics set to comedy worked so effectively. Maybe we just plain suck.
IQ is pseudoscience bullshit. People in economies above basic farming have more kids due to religion or the expectation that they will make more money in the future, not because they are dumb. Additionally smart is sexy. If your goal was for more kids to be born all you have to do is make everyone follow religions that push for it or radically shift economic gains to the younger population. Given that religion sucks and we are not going to rebalance the money we are left with the situation we have.
Always so hilarious to see politicians trying to impove demographics and outlets wondering "why don't we have kids" while absolutely 0 things are done to improve our financial situation.
Capitalism will do everything, but last thing it will do is share profits with people.
Sometimes I find folks that play the ethics and environmental card to describe their lack of want to have children a bit disingenuous. Some of those DINKs are the most jet setting, extravagant, and excessive consumers. Better safari and see the animals in person before they go extinct, or fly around to scuba dive to see all the reefs in person before they die. If you want to have a lot of discretionary income to have fun with and see the world without having the responsibility of child raising, that's fine. But don't pretend it's an ethical decision.
It's crazy how many people have kids because they view them as an eventual resource.
Like, they want the return on investment for bringing a life into this world.
Completely ignoring how much kids cost. Throw that shit in a 401k and you'll be able to retire early, enjoy yourself, and pay for elder care yourself when it's necessary.
Like, if it's just a random explanation they came up with to explain why they have kids it's one thing, but anyone that seriously believes this would be a good plan...
There won't be anyone to care for the elderly or work normal, service, or public service jobs. The economy will crash, and life will feel like a dystopia.
Having kids only so that they'll take care of you when you're old is one of the worst reasons to have kids I've ever heard. A child who is only wanted because they can do something on your behalf in the future is not a child who will be loved. What child deserves that?
My guy, I'd literally rather kill myself when I can't take care of myself anymore than create a whole entire human being that I don't want for the sole purpose of having a nursemaid when I'm old. That's like, the worst possible reason to have a kid. Not to mention that there are tons of reasons a kid might not be able/willing to take on that role, so plenty of people are going to end up totally boned if that's their plan anyway.
So you just accidentally admitted that your children were a purely selfish act. Checks out, honestly. The people who would actually be good parents often don't want to be. The ones who are hot garbage as parents don't care, are dumb and overconfident, and have many kids. Dunning Kruger effect applies here to a sickening degree.
I'm not sure if you've picked up on the pattern, but it won't end well for anyone either way. People are getting poorer and less secure just plain matter of fact. Retirement age is coming later and later. Healthcare becoming less and less accessible. Late life benefits are at the whim of a bunch of geriatrics in DC who persistently vote to reduce, delay, or completely remove things previous generations enjoyed.
The outcome isn't changing no matter the path anyone of us takes. So you may as well keep kids out of that inevitably.