Let's start with a big-ass "H"!
The past is the past, surely more letters will fit in the same space!
Amateurs. Never put a date on your rapture predictions. Just say it is happening soon.
Better yet, if you get enough people to listen to you, start saying you're Jesus.
totally not cult behavior
Thank god there is no ninth of hexadecember, so no worries.
Maybe this in Julian calendar?!
That means we only have 247 years left!! REPENT!!
Can't I fuck off for 246 days and repent the day of? I mean, I just bought this bag of coke and another one of oxy. D:
My favorite month in the dual-year. Junetobuary.
It's almost 9pm where I am and there's no sign of it. Jesus better hurry his ass up if he wants to be on time.
19th here, I think I got left behind.
It's happening on the 9th of 18th month, we've still got some time.
But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.
Matthew 24:36.
RTFM, noob.
Does this imply that the rapture won't happen on any day any man or angel predicted it, and suggest that these crackpots are either delivering a "no rapture today" message from the Lord Almighty or else embarrassing Her into putting it off?
Reginald, The Fingerless Mittens!
RTFB
Hi guys, its the 19th here in Australia already and I can confirm that I have been Left Behind to suffer heck on earth for being a sinner and Im super over it already.
You sure everybody got raptured and you're not just in Australia?
Party time!
Everyone is dead. Everyone except us.
Jesus better fucking come I've been jerking him off for like 20 minutes
Jesus, King of the Edging!
I MISSED IT!?
No, they neglected to put the first part of the year, it's happening in 2124.
Whew ok..... Just 100 more years and I can learn to rap
9-18-249-19-249-20-249-21-249-22-24I mean...if they keep this up they will be right eventually...right?
Like my wife, every day for 17 years, "That tree is going to fall down."
Tree falls down.
"I told you so."
LMFAO
Why is 2038 missing?
They were always right about the date. They just were wrong about what Jesus is looking for.
They may have screwed up their ISO date format. They really mean it'll happen on the 9th day of the 18th month of 2024.
It tracks
Never mind the old flippediroo of the day and month. What I want to know is why is there a dash in front of the date. I thought the separators went between the things to be separated.
Not again
Afraid so. Hope you enjoy the great snatch.
From snatch you came, and to snatch you shall return.
What happens if you have a Sinful Thought during "The Great Snatch"? Do you get un-Snatched? What if you immediately Repent? Do you get Snatched again? Will there be people bouncing back and forth indefinitely?
nonsense, there are only 12 months
so nobody can know the date of the rapture, and if someone figures it out god'll change it?
what if I make a website that just says "the rapture will be [current date +1]"
checkmate?
So I was justified when I left those dishes in the sink. Thank goodness. Thank you, Jesus.
The lord works in mysterious ways!
Some archeologists get paid to dig up old kitchen tools from early human history. You’re just leaving stuff for the archeologists in 2424
What mental gymnastics do you think the sign maker will have to perform, when nothing happens today?
Mysterious Ways ™️
This is someone who is clearly winded after light mental calisthenics.
But imagine how foolish we all would look if this would happen. 😁
Oh, shit! Who will water my plants?!
It's your lucky day - I happen to run a post-rapture plant watering and pet sitting business - I'm sure as shit not getting raptured.
Jesus. Obvs.
Pretty sure pouring wine onto plants will kill them.
Haha! Yeah right, this is like the ten thousandth time they've s
Oh no, they were raptured mid-sentence! How nice of the angels to hit send before dragging them away.
It's probably a coded message. Read it in the order of colors.
Jesus is rapture - 9-18-24 will on coming the happen.
It all makes sense!
JESUS IS THE RAPTURE
COMING WILL HAPPEN ON 9-18-24
sigh… if you insist
JESUS IS A RAPTOR
This image is stained on my occipital lobe
God, I wish God would actually just end this cringe already.
Good thing I tried pegging for the first time tonight then! Ticked that one off the bucket list just in time!
Congrats on the pegging, happy for you.
Can we go ahead and get the rapture over with so the rest of us can get some peace and god damn quiet?
We should sell tickets.
Still the 18th here. Anyone know where I can buy some inflatable sex dolls and helium at this hour?
Why helium?
To inflate the sex dolls.. He prefers doing chicks when they're high.
So they float, of course.
This is an old internet joke.
What timezone is the rapture in?
Trying to decide if I should stay up and get some photos
America, obviously. EST
Sorry, gonna have to miss the rapture, I have DnD this weekend.
I didn’t get raptured, too much thc and alcohol in your system makes you too heavy for the angels to carry I think.
If all the good folk are gone though I sure hope for less traffic on my road trip this weekend. Praise jeebus? 🤷♂️
May you be toughed by thy Noodley appendage! - FIFY
Can we reschedule? I have plans tonight
Jesus is having sex today.
"WILL HAPPEN"
HAPP EN
The miracle of prophecy is not related to the miracle of proper kerning.
The kerning looks okay - it's the font that's weird.
"Yes! I have the foresight to predict The RaptureTM, but not the foresight to fit the words onto a cardboard sign..." lol
Spoiler alert: it's already happened, and all the virtuous people already ascended to heaven.
I REFUSE to believe gahd has put me on par with Karen by leaving both of us on Earth! I demand to talk to his manager!
That explains why I'm still here.
My nipples are on fire. Send help. 😢
WTF! I missed it? Did every single Jehovah's witness drink the juice so they could fly into the spaceship or what? Postponed?
Fun fact: Jehovah's witnesses think only 144,000 men go to heaven and then all the good JWs get new bodies on Earth.
Funner fact. The Jehovah's Witnesses calculated that the year would be 1844, and someone did start a religion that year claiming to be the return, but that was in Persia, so they didn't know. They decided they must have miscalculated, and recalculated the date multiple times until 1900 at which point they basically just said, "he's late." They were literally started to look for the return of Christ, and because it didn't happen exactly the way they thought it should, they gave up and claimed that God must be wrong.
I have fun with JWs when they come to my door.
Shit! I had it all wrong! Okay but now that the rapture is over and not gonna happen anymore, then maybe everyone can go back to their regularly scheduled Friday?
Is this EST, PDT, Australish? Need to plan my pooping.
again?
It's an ever-occurring rapture. People stop being alive all the time.
There were 666 likes to this post. I ruined it by turning it to 667!
Do we need any more proof that the rapture is over and we missed it?
Shit, I missed it.
Shouldn't have taken that nap.
Oh man I'm here just waiting to look at jesus and say "Fucking took you long enough!! wtf you doing up there while I was working my ass off you fuck? I hope that linda bitch is not coming with us!"
I think the rapture happened a decade ago and this is hell
Purgatory.
Everyone is a sinner. Especially the religious types.
I hope it's during work hour. Would be shame to do whole days work just to get eaten by the rising dead.
c/agedlikemilk
POV: It didn't happen
Time to paint a new sign, methinks.
Seems like the planning for this was the same planning they put into making the words fit on the sign.
THE RAPTURE WILL HAPP^EN
I'm glad it didn't happen because I got to pet a cat while the world was supposed to be ending.
I'm pretty sure my plans are fine. Jesus is going to take one look at us and turn around.
Is that why there's an abandoned pair of shorts in the parking deck? And here I thought someone was running around pantless.
The velociraptures got him 😩 RIP
Imagine if what qualified to get raptured were believing in it. The world would be so much better without all those people!
ah fuck i missed the rapture again. guys how was it?
Kind of boring actually.
He's got the wrong date.
To quote late musician Peter Steele:
April 2029, the final time The end my friends is not near, the hour in fact is quite here ... It's a Friday 13th of course you won't live, to see noon. ... Are you paranoid what's on the asteroid has got your name tattooed on it? This stone's called Apophis And it brings apocalypse.
The rapture probably did happen but nobody on earth was worthy.
I would get letters from my grandma - long, winding beseeching me to come to the Lord or whatever, with often a specific date predicted in the near future of the end times. I never kept them because I was embarrassed. She was lonely and mentally ill, and probably trying to manipulate people into visiting her, but she also believed the shit she was saying, even though it kept changing, IMO.
I think that's a little bit of what is going on with these signs
Oh come on! I was gonna get a haircut today.
Welp, I have only now seen this post on the 19.09.2024.
I guess I did not only miss the notification, but also the rapture itself.
According to their own book, no man will know the day or the hour IIRC. So anyone who says they know, at all, is by default wrong, and you can guarantee that it won't happen at that time.
The
Jehovah's Witnesses7th Day Adventists figured out that it was supposed to happen in 1844. According to The Baha'is, they were right but wrong at the same time.
It's gonna be 10:12pm so we have time for a last meal still if you want before Jesus chucks everyone in the woodchipper. 😊
Batting .000 here religious sign guy.
I wish
Jesus came, broke my fridge, and didn’t even leave a note. Asshole.
Oh please yes!
I think the Rapture was going to be happy before it was to happen.
wordington rapture
Fuck no it ain't gonna happen, I gotta finish my studying so I can actually work fuck that
Surely MORE letters will fit in the same space! Haha, this is the first thing I thought of https://youtu.be/GMp-MVI6xDs?si=-fws95UURq5_ziRt
Meh.. I prefer the Zorp scenario
