Firecracker is the nearest thing to a red rocket, so
Firecracker and it's not even close. I've put ice cubes up there before and it wasn't nearly as bad as you'd imagine. The shape of it will make it easy. Plus, the ridges on it mean you'll have less ice in contact with your skin. At some point it melts and it's just a Popsicle stick.
Edit: Additional thoughts on this because I can't stop thinking about how goofy this is lol. I've cream sandwich and to a lesser degree the chipwich are tempting. The difficulty would be that they just crumble and don't really go in, but you have to shove it in. I'm counting melted ice cream/ice that comes out after it's in as not needing to be reinserted. I've cream sandwich "crust" is actually very soft so it wouldn't be bad to have in there. It's just the process of getting it in would be very weirdly difficult.
Many of the other choices (like the snow cone thing and push pop) have a lot of plastic parts that make it basically impossible.
The drumstick may seem tempting but it's just gonna crack and hurt.
Once the popsicle stick of the firecracker is in, you just softly pull it out. The biggest risk is splinters, but I don't think popsicle sticks in popsicles ever really have splinters like the loose ones you can buy for projects.
Why did they write "to" as 2, but then the actual number 1 as "one"?
Firecracker.
Aerodynamic.
Fleshodynamic*
Firecracker for ease, Tweety to please.
I wish I hadn't read this.
In Germany we have an ice cram called Flutsch Finger for exactly that purpose.
Firecracker would be the least cumbersome. But I always wondered what it would be like to be penetrated by a taco, instead of the other way around.
You fuck tacos?
Of the pink variety.
What you're not even gonna give me the sponge Bob as a choice??
Not including a Golden Gaytime in these options is a real missed opportunity...
That's so weird - I heard about, for the first time, and looked up this ice-cream only this morning. There was a failed petition to change the name, which generated a number of counter petitions.
Now this is shitposting
Technically he only posted ice-cream
I've seen enough EMT Tiktok to know that I need a flared base.
So I'ma have to go with screwball but upside down
...can I take more than one?
Story of my life here
I read it as "you have two" so you can have at least 2. However many past the first you want to shove up there is up to you
In you go tweety bird
Asked my girlfriend for a second opinion, she said Screwball backwards and she's right, damn it.
Truly a (reverse?) shitpost.
Snowcone because it melts faster and will moisen the paper making it easier to remove.
I was going to say that
Strawberry eclair so it blends in.
Hospital. Now.
their ice cream is awful tho
No contest, push pop has a user friendly applicator
Tweety's gonna go spelunking.
Wait is this like a retrospective or more aspirational?
What's the rectal equivalent of brain freeze? Prostate & chill?
Anyone who doesn't choose a Creamsicle is not getting the full experience of something up your ass
Probably the firecracker
11, horizontally. I'm gonna put the "choco" in "choco taco"
I've been talking about Choco Tacos all week. What the fuck do I have to do to get one? This implies they are still around for me to be able to shove one up my ass. Is that what I have to do? I'll fucking do it at this point
You can’t stop me from shoving them all up there.
Nothing with chocolate
I'm gonna need some clarifications here. Does the stick/cone/tube go for the ride? How far up the ass does it need to go? Is this a proper insertion or a wedding-cake photo-op mushing situation? If it's insertion, can the ice cream be modified to fit the butthole, or must the butthole adapt to the ice cream? There's a lot of moving parts and complex interplay going on.
Breyers Ice Cream Box.
Push pop, backwards.
Your mom's fist isn't on the list... So, none of the above.
Chocolate Eclair. Nice texture. Really scrapes the sides clean.
Wow I forgot all about screwballs! Those used to be my favorite as a kid I wonder if I can still get them
I saw them at an ice cream truck a few days ago!
Choco tacos for the classy evenings
You'd put a Choco Taco in your choco taco? Fierce.
It's boffo
Anyone that says anything other than Choco Taco is a coward.
I only like room temperature objects in my ass. I will have to pass.
snow cone, but backwards
I might get flagged for spamming this same response everywhere, but snow cone backwards all day, Alex.
The firecracker looks like it could get a good leverage and the chilling sensation would be new.
Same goes for the pushpop and i could get a good rhythm going like a jackhammer.
Longevity is probably going to be the biggest hurdle here though
Half of lemmy: hah jokes on you, im into that shit!
I don't think I do have to do that... no.
You must
Chipwich and I'll smash it into my ass like I'm an upside down cookie monster.
Push pop.... And Firecracker... May as well go for it...
Choco taco.... in the name of racism, please americans explain me how have you come to this?!
This is one of those "To show loyalty to Israel" challenges right? Can't I just blow the donkey?
