I, like most of us on Lemmy, live a better life than almost the entirety of the rest of human history.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, the world and by extension you have been so kind to me and I turned out to be just this worthless waste of oxygen, my existence a net negative of epic proportions and yet I'm too cowardly to at least end this miserable experiment.
Life is full of wonders and joy and there's so much more to enjoy!
Life is full of putting on a face and smiling and playing a well-adjusted individual and I'm so tired.
Welcome to depression-ville, population way too fucking many.
I'm not sure how applicable mine are but here goes:
About a decade ago, I got back into soccer as an adult. I played as a kid so it wasn't as bad but my fitness took a couple years to get back up to snuff and I had a bunch of pulled muscles the first couple years. Now though, it's my favourite thing and I play 3 times a week (which is admittedly, too many times) and for those three hours, I don't think about the world, work, politics, life or anything, all that matters is keeping a ball out of our net. (And of course I've made some great friends along the way.)
As part of the getting back into shape, I've really dug swimming. It's easy on these old man muscles and you can feel the improvement. (the hot tub afterwards is pretty nice too.)
I also got back into reading non fiction. I hadn't looked for anything really new or interesting since the mid 00s, and reddit for all its faults had some really interesting suggestions in r/fantasy and r/sciencefiction which were a blast to read!
During the pandemic, I tried video games. Not really for me but some folks love them.
There's an independent theatre down the street and I love just popping in and seeing what weird and wild stuff they have. Sure, at home is cheap but there's something amazing about the big screen especially for a slower movie that would be way too tempting to bust out a phone for. I would never have made it through Lawrence of Arabia, the Good the Bad and the Ugly or Skinamarink without busting out a phone if I hadn't been in a theatre.
There are some great little indie music venues in my city, there's something refreshing about watching a young garage band that'll go nowhere but is having a blast.
Some of my buddies are really into board games, which are fun. Not quite my thing but I fully get it.
I dunno, maybe some of those appeal? But really, I think the question is what are you interested in? What makes you smile? Or what has made you smile in the past?
I like making stuff. The point is that you do something where you can see something grow over time into something more than just the sum of your effort. It can be anything.
I own a house, so most stuff I make are extensions or improvements on the house. Last year I build a chicken coupe. This year I remodelled the unused hallway.
If you don't own a house you could try volunteering somewhere. I recently started volunteer work with the theatre group my daughter is a member of.
Or maybe gardening, rent a plot at a community garden.
Even working out at the gym can have the same effect.
This is how I like to think about it. There’s so many cool things I haven’t gotten to experience, both natural and man-made. Giving up would mean I never get to see them and appreciate them.
What's the point of life at all? Its been slow the first 25 years, the rest being slow doesn't bother me much anymore. I'm tired, but I'm too lazy to go out quick.
Why does it need to "amount" to something? Do you know anything about most of the people who have lived? Do you expect that of everyone around you?
Enjoy yourself, enjoy being alive and embodied while you are, maybe you accomplish something for someone else, maybe you don't, no big deal. Just being here is an incredible thing to have.
I'm vegan, non-binary (with dyed hair), car-free, a member of a linguistic minority, poor, and many other things that make conservatives think the world would be better off without me. I strive to survive mostly to spite these fuckers.
If nothing else, my family. I don't have a good sense of the future or life goals, so I keep myself moving by setting small goals. Plans to bake something, working on a painting, just little things around the home.
Hello fellow non life goal setter!
Having that life goal mentality fucked me up for years, went to therapy and learned to live in the present while trying not to obsess about the future. So now little things are what keeps me going: Getting to yoga class, fixing a nice plate of food if I feel like it, petting my dogs, crocheting so I feel thr burden of the stuff that has to get done a little less.
Nicotine, pain killers, a laughable disability payment...
...and a furious, blinding rage at the inequity of modern terminal stage capitalism that has doomed our planet to ecocide and most of its inhabitants into petty, self-centered, egotistical and ignorant caricatures of human beings...
...which has mostly congealed and calcified into some kind of mixture of contempt and spite that is either the basis of, or what I can erroneously yet convincingly present to myself and others as the basis of my identity, self-worth and sense of humor, concluding that merely surviving as long as I can, and pursuing that which I enjoy which requires next to 0 monetary expenditure, is the meek and feeble yet largest middle finger I can personally raise toward all who pursue wealth accumulation, or enable those who do.
Whenever I habe to ask myself that question I remind myself I'm doing the best I can considering the circumstances of my upbringing. And that I already did a lot of good even though it often damaged myself.
The people I have chosen to spend my days with. My spouse, my child, a few friends. And also daydreaming about vacation...specifically vacationing with all of those people. That would be incredible.
It was a quote that I read on lemmy. Someone was talking about dealing with suicidal thoughts and he asked his friend why he shouldn’t kill himself. His friend thought for a minute and then looked at him and said “Mornings are pretty nice.”
It was at that point he realised he shouldn’t be looking for some great reason for some great reason for life and instead just be.
I've started blogging about videogames. So I'm just enjoying writing about stuff and looking forward to my posts on Wednesdays. No one reads it but it's nice to write my thoughts down about games that I play.
My lucid dreams are unspeakably realistic, comprehensively and indistinguishable from reality. It's like waking up each night into a horrible dystopia.
In my nightmares, there's a global autocracy, a kind of maximalism of pain which forces people into mass slavery, but it's not even according to their whims, it's simply a price for existing.
The delusion that the world will inevitably turn out fine, despite occasionally saying the opposite. That, and the massive amount of stuff I still wanna do (games to play) and experiences to be had (music to be listened to, shows to be watched, computer mumbo jumbo to be learned)
Up to about the 1980s, the popular magazines used to frequently run cartoons with ragged-looking people holding up 'It's the END OF THE WORLD!!!!' signs. Guess they ran out of variants on that joke. But Doomsday Prophets have been around for centuries (some made big money from it) ... and yet ... here we all are.
We humans like to scare ourselves, but observation seems to show that it's not a big worry. Will it all end, sure, some day. When? NOBODY KNOWS. Carpe diem, my friend ... seize the day. And go ahead and make plans and execute them. Save your worry time for the little things that are inevitable.
Everyone’s different and some medications work better for one person than another. I can’t speak for OP, nor can I suggest that your experience would be the same as mine, but finding an antidepressant that works was a game changer for me.
It helps keep the “doom” thoughts from spinning in my head. That is, I can hear or read about something bad, but it won’t keep coming back to haunt me throughout the day. Ever lie down to sleep, but instead find your mind awake for hours with worries and anxieties? My antidepressant prevents that.
An interesting side-effect is that it also keeps songs from getting stuck in my head. Again, YMMV, but note that it does take time (usually at least 2 weeks, maybe more) for the full effects to kick in.
I arrange to do culturally stimulating things in the evenings or weekends like seeing a concert/opera, going to an art gallery or a movie. The rest of the time I'm pouring effort into my career or long term relationship, which are both rewarding in the long term. Sometimes I like "switch-off" entertainment like sports when I've got a free schedule.