Donald Trump says 'nasty' Canada 'meant to be 51st state'
Donald Trump says 'nasty' Canada 'meant to be 51st state'
"I deal with every country, indirectly or directly. One of the nastiest countries to deal with is Canada," Trump said.
Ladies and gentlemen, the dumbest person on the planet, Donald Trump.
People joke that being Canada is like living in an apartment where the person living in the floor below is a crack addict. Now, that crack addict is trying to steal your toilet to sell it for crack.
We’ll wipe out anyone who dares to invade our country. Scorched earth. We will render the Great Lakes radioactive for thousands of years.
But 50 is such a nice round number
Nasty is a compliment. It's what he called Freeland after she stood up to him in the last trade negotiations.
It's also pretty funny from a guy who jails children, threatens others constantly, abuses power, and makes enemies just by breathing. I actually think in his head "nasty" really just means "won't simply bend over for me".
nasssty little canadianses
they HATESss uss. they put the tAriffssss on usss!
but we loves the canadienses! we want them to be our stateses!
NOO! we hates the nassty canadienses. we give them MORE tAriffsss! make them ssuffer!
I know I'm asking a lot, but can anyone compile the list of everyone that Trump has called "nasty"? Because I feel like we're in really good company.
“Nasssty Canada, with its healthcare and reciprocal tariffs!” Krasnov hissed. “It burns us, precious!”
He hunched over in the dim glow of the Oval Office, stroking a golden golf ball in his palms, his eyes darting between it and the maps spread across his desk. “They take advantage of us, yes they do. Always winning, always smug with their free doctor visits and politeness. Weak! But strong! It’s tricksy, so tricksy!”
A cough echoed from the corner. His chief of staff, a weary-looking man with thinning hair, cleared his throat. “Sir, this—uh—this meeting with Prime Minister Trudeau is important. We need to discuss trade.”
Krasnov recoiled, clutching the ball tighter. “Trade?! TRADE?! Filthy free-traders! They cheat us! Steal from us! But we—” He paused, his voice dropping into a desperate whisper. “We could… could take their milk, yes, yes! Their delicious dairy! Make America milky again!”
His chief of staff pinched the bridge of his nose. “Sir, we already produce a lot of milk.”
Krasnov’s face twisted, his fingers tightening around the golf ball like a strangling grip. “No! Canadian milk is special! It’s… socialist milk! It must be destroyed! We put tariffs on it, we crush them, and then we take it for ourselves, yessss!”
A flicker of doubt passed across his face. He shook his head violently, as though fighting himself. “But what if… what if Canada is right?” His voice softened, a pained expression twisting his features. “What if… universal healthcare isn’t nasssty? What if… it’s… good?”
He gasped, stumbling backward, horror-stricken. “No! No, no, no, never! That’s socialism! That’s evil! We hates it!” He flung the golf ball across the room, where it clattered against a bust of Lincoln and rolled onto the carpet.
His chief of staff stared, unsure of what to say.
Krasnov froze, then slowly crawled toward the ball, cradling it again in his hands. “We must punish Canada. Yes, precious. We must make them pay. Or else… or else we lose.”
A long silence followed.
Finally, the chief of staff sighed. “I’ll call the trade representative.”
That's really well written.
Yep but contains 100% more inner monologue than would ever be recorded in the slow, tremulous sine wave that is Trump's EEG.
Can we call on Andy Serkis to Narrate this please.
He's not dumb. He's cancer. He's aggressive. And he intends on metastasizing to the entire world. Strongmen only respect strength. We need to show him how nasty we can be. Watch what he does with targets he perceives as weaker than us (if there are any). If he goes after Panama first, or Greenland, you can be certain that we are next.
This is not empty rhetoric folks. I've been saying it since before the election and I'm going to keep saying it, he's actually coming for us. His first term was full of empty threats. This one hasn't been. He has followed through, and he will follow through. He will continue to bully us and come at us sideways for awhile, take what he can by hook or by crook, but eventually he will get impatient and greedy. He is coming. Prepare to be another Ukraine, another Afghanistan. The latter is a tiny, technologically backwards nation that is called the "Graveyard of empires" for good reason. We can be that, and we will need to be that. I say this to reassure you that it is absolutely possible to defend our sovereignty against a much larger aggressor. This is anything but a lost cause, but we need to take it very seriously, because he is deadly serious.
He absolutely is dumb. But that doesn't mean he's not dangerous.
He looks to us the way Putin looks at Ukraine.
Someone tell Doug Ford that capitulating to Trump is not going to pay off. He seems to be moving from big talk of resistance to total submission.
That what conservative do they would sell canada at the first chance but they have to look like big bad men so they bark a little then roll over
SCOTUS declaring full immunity for anything done as an official presidential act is probably why this term feels less hollow; last time around he had to be careful not to end up in prison, this time he has nothing to fear.
Cancer is very dumb, by any metric I can possibly imagine:
- it literally lacks any mechanism for intellect/processing information
- it is a random mutation that renders affected cells dysfunctional
- it has no mechanism to spread to another host, yet still kills the host it has
- it has four different ways that it might just kill itself
This only makes the metaphor all the more apt. Intelligent foes are far less dangerous. You have to be exceedingly dumb to choose mutually assured destruction.
I have never known a man who needed to get punched in the face worse than Donald Trump. I am not a violent man. I detest "online tough guys" who treat every situation as an excuse to advocate for violence. And I'm not saying I endorse a bullet or a guillotine or something like that. I'm not even saying I'd punch him.
But this man has clearly never been punched in his shit-talking mouth, and if someone had done it 40 or 50 years ago, we wouldn't be here now.
I'm not even saying I'd punch him.
I'll do it.
Get in line.
And I'm not saying I endorse a bullet or a guillotine or something like that.
Honestly, my greatest wish for Trump and Musk? That they have all their wealth and contacts stripped from them, and they either spend the rest of their lives in a blue collar prison, or homeless on the street without a single soul willing to help them.... I'll settle for the guillotine though.
I think that Gitmo is the only answer to prison for these guys. Send em where they send those they do not agree with.
And I'm not saying I endorse a bullet or a guillotine or something like that.
Hitler died from a bullet, fired from his own gun. His advisors were tried for war crimes, convicted, sentenced to death, and hanged. I think we can all agree that these were reasonable conclusions.
"Hello, is this Canada? I got a vermin infestation in a White House that could use fumigation. Do it like how you did in 1814. It is too far gone to be saved."
America has been subsidizing Canada
2024: Canada imports ~$480 billion total from the USA. Divided by 40 million Canadian population, that's $12,000 for every man, woman, and child spent on American shit.
USA imports ~$586 billion from Canada. Divided by 400 million population, that's only $1,465 per capita, and that's only 1/8th of the amount that Canadians bought from the USA in return.
##BUY CANADIAN, BE FAIR!##
You can't compare apples to apples when one side of the equation has 10 times the population. If we're trying to be fair, Trumpistan needs to buy 8 times more Canadian shit!
Tariffs on the Canadian side will be reciprocal and will only serve to make us stop buying Murcan shit, leading to an even bigger Trumped-up deficit and the loss of their biggest, best customer. Likely long-term.
"I deal with every country, indirectly or directly. One of the nastiest countries to deal with is Canada," Trump said.
I'll take that as a complement from you. Thanks!
Yeah. Tells me our government is working.
If he stops being adversarial on every situation and threatening us then we'll be friendly, like we are with every other country.
Donald Trump was meant to die in prison.
Founding fathers would have had him hanging from a tree
Let's show lil' don how nasty we can be.
Breaking out the Geneva Checklist?
Good. Proud to be Canadian.
Still stolen land.
I mean, yeah, every plot of land was "stolen" from another group throughout history. Even going back to before Homo sapiens, and most certainly between indigenous tribes.
Fortunately, Canada has acknowledged our history, and has been in the position to give back and support our first nations throughout the years.
More work needs to be done, for sure, but this doesn't diminish Canada in any way.
I honestly don't understand the downvotes. Canada is a settler colonial state, does anyone dispute that here? The indigenous people were coerced into "signing treaties" without having the legal and cultural framework, and without having the status and power to be fully free parties into a free agreement. And regardless, this is one of the things we are actually doing better(*) than the yanks: we have had a Truth and Reconciliation Commission, and we are learning to cope with our past. Every person who becomes Canadian swears to "faithfully observe the laws of Canada including the Constitution which recognizes and affirms the aboriginal and treaty rights of First Nations, Inuit and Métis peoples".
The US is a country that had a noble foundation and a shitty follow through. Canada is the opposite: a shitty foundation, a noble follow through. We are precisely the one of the two that does not pretend we came from the pure ideal of some idealized founding daddies, we specifically understand that we must always improve. We're a forward facing people. That's why I'm proud to be Canadian.
(*) "better", not well. We actually have a very long way to go, and we still are very bad at treating indigenous people. The downvotes actually attest to that.
He still wants to annex us.
Canadians, crank up the nastiness a little more.
So why does he want to annex Canada if it's so "nasty"?
Nasty, filled with drugs, and we have nothing that Americans need! LOL What a clown.
Oh you haven't seen nasty yet, Donald.
Trump can go fuck himself, can't he?
Not if Stormy Daniels is to be believed (I see no reason to not believe her). She went on a late show and showed the mushroom closest to Donalds appendage
This country is the nastiest skank removed I’ve ever met. Do not trust them.
Yes so nasty of us Canadians sending super scoopers to help with their fires. If only we were one of the nice, friendly, genocidal countries like Isreal.
You've managed to piss off the country whose reputation is that they apologize for everything. Stupid idiot.
Good.
Let him stick to that line, keeping Canadians angry and trade negotiations stalled. He's helping us maintain the momentum needed to build a stronger Canada and end reliance on U.S. trade for good. When he and his ilk are all eventually deposed, the U.S. will have to make many concessions to get (partially) back into our good graces. If that doesn't happen, our need for political separation will only increase.
No deal is the best deal.
When it comes to far right-wing 'conservatives/republicans', remember that "every accusation is an admission" - especially so for Trump.
I wish Australia and the UK were as nasty as Canada. Tariff the US already you cowards.
Nasty pasty, pudding and pie
That thumbnail is pretty nasty
He looks like he's wearing eyebrow wigs
I'm convinced the guy is literally doing this because of how it would look on a map. He took a look at how big Canada looks (partially due to Mercator) and thought "Wouldn't it be great if the my country was that big?"
We were beautiful last week, now we're nasty. Whatever. This charade is getting crustier than Trump's toe cheese.
I'd consider myself nice, but if you want nasty, Donald, I'll give you nasty.
Come on up here Trump, say that to our faces!
Can someone please get dementia Donny back to his nursing home please
Public spanking of Donald is in order. Time to put up Wanted sign for Don.
No fuckin' way i'm spanking that. Shit splatters
Dear Canadians,
Despite being fully taken over by morons, this soon-to-be US expat loves you.
I don't understand, will you be an American that temporarily lives and works in another country?
Or will you live and work in America temporarily?
In the latter case: why choose the us?
In the former case: Why only temporarily leave the US?
Diaper Don is further gone than Old Yeller was when his owner took him back behind the shed. Just sayin'
Wasn't Old Yeller rabid? Not that the farting Cheeto might not also be, of course.
Politically, Canada and California are indistinguishable. The United States with two Californias would look more like Canada than it would the current US.
The GOP cringes every time Trump talks about a 51st state.
Haha, good one. Ok you can stop joking now. Guys did-- did you hear me? YOU CAN STOP JOKING NOW GUYS
Oh really Donny, are they deplorable?
Tell your representatives/Carney to stop cowering, and spending on military vs Russia, and to be more aggressive on winning trade war. Cancel F35s today. Can renegotiate much better later if trade war resolved.
