Bathroom mishap

It aint a blog meme without a useless comment at the bottom

But if we didn't have a reaction included in the post, how would we know how we're meant to feel?
- Just realized blog-meme-commentary are functionally equivalent to sitcom laugh tracks.
Of course I'm not watching this 1m20s video without a webcam of an obnoxious guy wearing a spiderman outfit yelling in the corner of the screen.
- I’m not watching this 30 se*ond video without subway surfers gameplay
I choked on my uselessness.
Bonus points if it's Xavier.

This is bullshit because no bloke has ever mumbled a word in a dunny block.

No one has ever offered to play battle shits with you?
- It's a solo game unless you are in the special competitive pvp stalls
Your use of "bloke" implies you're in the UK, so perhaps it's just manners... But as someone who has worked in a large, multi-cultural office in the US, it is definitely a cultural thing. There are some people that have no problem chatting on the phone at full volume, in an echo-y stall, while audibly shitting. And I mean audibly lol.

I have had one experience where I was sitting in the middle stall, of three, between two people who were having a full-on conversation back and forth over me. I kept like clearing my throat just in case maybe they didn't realize someone was there... Nope, they just didn't care lol.

Just the thought of behaving like that is mortifying to me lol, especially in an office where I have to then interact with those people...
- I'm an Aussie. Same king, different colony :P
  
  Crosstalk while trying to dump a load sounds horrendous.
- There are some people that have no problem chatting on the phone at full volume, in an echo-y stall, while audibly shitting. And I mean audibly lol.
  
  I experienced that in New Jersey once. A man was speaking Spanish, presumably while on the phone. And he was very audibly taking a shit. He even continued talking while straining to push the poop out.

I've talked on the shitter. I heard someone dying and asked if they needed help, they never replied, just did up their belt and fled in panic. Never again!

I rather die alone on a toilet than talk while pooping. I'd flee too.
Yep. Heard a coworker vomiting her guts out in the accessible stall and I asked if she needed help. Turns out she was just having morning sickness.
- A few months ago I went to a steakhouse with some friends and learned that 3 ladies from the wedding party in the party room had had too much to drink and were sharing a stall (small bathroom with only 2 stalls) puking their guts out for a solid 20 minutes straight. As we paid and left we saw the paramedics arrive to escort the ladies off of the premises and an employee poised and ready with cleaning supplies to begin cleaning up the wreckage their stomachs had wrought upon the porcelain.
LOL oh man this story is so funny to me. I'm picturing it from both people's points of view and its hilarious either way.

The urinals didn't tip her off?

I've been in men's room recently that didn't have urinals in view when I walked in. Which did give me a slight panic for a moment that I had walked into the wrong door.

I opened the first stall door, and there was the urinal. Interesting.

They had also adopted the European style of floor to ceiling stalls and stall doors. It was actually a very nice experience.
- Common European W
- The stall only contained a urinal? What happens if you need to take a shit?
Maybe the guy sitting next to her was in the wrong bathroom.

chooooooooke on the water~

I like that the response from guys isn't "a woman?! In MY bathroom?!?!" But "who tf talks in the bathroom?!"

I have been told that Lemmy leans ever so slightly left of center if not out right progressive. If you squint, you might catch a glimpse some day.

Something that definitely happened

And all the guys at the urinals cheered, and bumped hips whilst continuing to pee

Who the are these people talking in the stalls. I be worried someone would try and kick my ass. I've seen people go ape shit if you disturb them during a shit in public.

I once had a friend of mine go into the stall next to mine and loudly declare that we were "pooping buddies"
I don't know about being mad, but if a coworker tries to talk to me in the restroom regardless of specifics they immediately go on my "perhaps has body in basement" list. Usually it's the Cxx people...who are sociopaths. So the math works out.
- I only know that some people use CXX as extension for their C++ (programming language) files, but I don't think that's what you meant
All of my coworkers, they will just strike up work combo.