resign
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You're playing the french
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You played 3 moves while playing as black when white played 2 moves. Your cat needs to call an arbiter for illegal play.
White pawns could have moved forward by one space at a time instead of two spaces in one turn. Perfectly legal.
That's the only way to be certain you won't be jumped end passant.
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Knock a few pieces over and go find a warm spot to have a nap
Ah, the Bast Conclusion.
Meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow, meow meow.
laser pointer on top of black king in one for checkmate.
I believe, knocking all the figures off the board is the only legal move...
Bite your opponent's ankle to win by default
Cat to F5
I'm white too.
Check your privilege.
Vomit right on the board.
Puss out.
Horsey to block
Thanks @[email protected] for the photo
Piss on board, play with chess piece then murder it brutally.
C3, Be7, good chances your opponent will just fold to it here.
