Yeah, I actually think about this. People recognize that time is a dimension of our reality, but ask: why does it only move forward? But wat if it doesn't? What if we go backwards and forwards often? But our memories are "unmade" when moving backwards and "remade" when moving forwards. We simply can only perceive the forward direction.
I work a lot with remote servers. I locked myself out in a similar way once or twice before. I felt like the dumbest person alive every time it happened.
I changed some of my router's VPN settings from abroad once because it wasn't performing as expected.
To apply the setting (through the GUI), I remembered you had to press the stop button and then the start button (there was no restart button in that menu). Guess what happened.
You actually can stop the time by snapping you fingers, but it stops time for the entire universe, including yourself, with the exception of one single observer on some unimportant planet in the Andromeda galaxy. After 100 years from the POV of that observer, time resumes again.
We could have a whole vent diagram of people than stop time, start time, or be immune to it. Imagine just going out for drinks with friends when times stops. But this has happened before so you walk across town, go in some dudes living room, and force his fingers to snap.
“Ah! Oh it’s you. Time stopped again?” “Yup” “Alright. Well hopefully whoever’s stopping time this time doesn’t REALLY like to snap.” “Hopefully. Well might be seeing more of me again. Bye!”
No. You would have to snap ~25000 times, for the light originating from there, to even reach you (Assuming, that light is unaffected by the time stop).
This hypothetical scenario assumes that stopping time is universal and instantaneous. Simultaneity in two reference frames, even when that doesn't make sense. Someone on earth snaps their fingers, and in that same instant, some unwitting observer spends 100 earth solar cycles in frozen, abject terror.
I think I believe that it's all the brain. You can change someone's personality entirely through accidental injury or intentional damage/medication.
And existence is just all chance. I used to desire more from everything but now I think humans are just another animal who developed a different evolutionary strategy and life is merely another means for entropy. Not to say it's not unique, but the value of it is only what we determine it is to ourselves.