The Onion @midwest.social RmDebArc_5 @sh.itjust.works 5d ago

JD Vance Warns Millions Of Women May Vote Under Influence Of Menstrual Madness

theonion.com JD Vance Warns Millions Of Women May Vote Under Influence Of Menstrual Madness

CINCINNATI—Moments after he frantically nailed two-by-fours across the closed door of the bedroom he shares with his wife, vice presidential candidate JD Vance issued a dire warning Wednesday, alerting the public that millions of women may vote under the influence of menstrual madness. “If they are ...

30 comments

I remember when The Onion was ridiculous.
- I too remember the present moment.
- Oh, it still is. Reality is just ALSO rediculous.
  
  Maybe they should shift gears and start printing stories like "JD Vance Apologizes to Haitian Immigrants" or "Trump Kicks Neo-Nazis Out of Rally".
I had to check the community and link, because I could believe he would say something like this.
- Honestly, I could imagine every single network reporting this exact headline and I wouldn't bat an eye.
- I believed it.
  
  Me too. I only realized it was onion the second time I scrolled through.
- I briefly believed it before realizing I should check.
- Given what has actually come out of this man's mouth, it was definitely plausible.
This one fuckin got me. Are they sure this didn’t actually happen?
- I think it has. In his head. The Onion just has an advanced scoop.
- Oh, I bit the onion pretty hard on this one.
Adding my +1 for I ate the onion
Me: God dammit. I must be slipping. I used to be able yo laugh at an obviously fake onion headline.

Comment section: I FELL FOR THE ONION HEADLINE!!!

Me: Oh good. It's not just me.
- Reality is the issue, not you.
- I had to triple check the source before I was convinced it wasn’t real.
  
  Maybe it is real. Anything’s possible these days.
Lol came in to admit defeat, and saw a ton of comments doing the same.

Not 100% sure The Onion didn't accidentally post something that actually happened again.
First time I had to check because I was sure it WASN'T the onion.
This headline is completely believable.
Why does this sound real
Onion is trying to make a comeback but honestly, their content has been a bit meh because it's almost too on the nose and close to reality.

Old onion was great because the satire cascaded into something completely out of this world humor.

Like if they ran their closeted republican report today (https://youtu.be/simV1ZXFsxI) it just wouldn't be as funny because the problem has only gotten worse in the wrong direction. There is just no next level up that they can go and still keep it satire.
"This woke imbalance of the humours causes women to put their own rights and interests ahead of the feelings of ~~insecure~~ very handsome and smart men, such as myself."

-JD Vance, probably
They are going to get in trouble. Satire has to be obvious.
Bruh I thought it was real.
renfield says what?
“Vaginas scare me!”

30 comments