When she shuts you down so hard that you reconsider your worth
I hate that evolutionary part of me that cares about having sex/a mate so much that I actually allow myself to become depressed based on the goddamn preferences of one person.
For years the only happiness I’ve found has been by removing myself from the market entirely and just writing off the notion of being with someone, a “with no hope/expectations there is no letdown” kind of thing.
I was carrying on just fine like this until I got a beautiful new coworker a few months ago who laughs at even my worst jokes like it’s going out of style. Alas though I’m sure she likes me I know I’m too old for her so here I am just unusually unhappy in my solitude for the first time in years. Ugh, is it time to get on tinder? I fucking hate the whole enterprise of dating.
Idk if dating is inherently bad, but the soulcrushing drive for profit that has consumed modern dating has defintely made it horrible.
I wonder if the downvotes are from people who think you sound incel-y. I mean, you do a little bit, but I think a lot of people nowadays identify with that "there's no point dating" feeling, though are too nervous to voice it. All but the most narcisissistic of us have a little voice in the back of our minds giving 'sage' advice about how worthless we are from time to time, and if you've dealt with a lot of rejection that only gets reinforced.
If you do try stuff like tinder, be well advised that it's a very long shot. You might be better off with a paid service like match.com... my dad found love after his divorce pretty quickly when he joined that site, I assume because anyone who's paying to be on a dating site is more invested in finding that someone special vs apps like tinder which incentivise short-term approach to dating.
Alas though I’m sure she likes me I know I’m too old for her so here I am just unusually unhappy in my solitude for the first time in years.
Just ask her if she knows of any single women your age she can set you up with. If she really likes you, she'll tell them what a great person you are. Or maybe she can give you tips about where to meet someone, how to ask someone out, etc.
Don't despair for having a potentially good friendship, those can be just as valuable as physical relationships.
I hate that evolutionary part of me that cares about having sex/a mate so much that I actually allow myself to become depressed based on the goddamn preferences of one person.
Hate to break it to you, but you framing this as in inherent part of yourself does not really help in dealing with it. It is something you can absolutely work on and for the sake of your mental health I hope you will be able to do that.
I agree with others, man. What's the age difference? Because I understand someone being too young (I'm 28 and I'm not sure I could date someone under 24 for example). Just very curious! You never know
I've never felt this relatable in all my days.
