ADHD
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My Experience with ADD, Depression, and Correspondence Chess
I wanted to share a personal experience that might resonate with some of you. I've been diagnosed with ADD and major depressive syndrome, and for a long time, I struggled to enjoy over-the-board chess.
The fast pace and constant need for focus left me feeling drained and frustrated – blaming myself for not being able to concentrate.
Then, I discovered correspondence chess! This format allows for a much slower pace, giving me the time I need to analyze positions and make thoughtful moves. It's been a game-changer. No more pressure, just the joy of strategic thinking without the stress.
Do you ever feel like traditional chess isn't quite the right fit?
If you struggle with focus or find the fast pace overwhelming, correspondence chess could be for you! Here are a couple of options to get you started:
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ICCF.com (International Correspondence Chess Federation): This is the official platform for serious correspondence chess with tournaments and rankings.
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Daily Chess on chess.com: This is a more casual option where you can play correspondence games at your own pace.
Let me know in the comments if you've tried correspondence chess, or if you're interested in giving it a go!
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Do I need to change my medication?
Recently, my doctor mentioned that we might want to start thinking about changing my medication (I'm taking Ritalin I think) for my work load as it may not be what I'll need to focus. I've also been having massive mood swings lately, had 2 panic attacks or got overestimated, my mind will completely blank out when I need to think, I'm having trouble talking when I get frustrated, and I've been agitated, and this seems to happen when I take my meds. Am I taking too much or do I need to change the meds?
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I'm struggling to focus, even when it comes to basic stuff like reading or learning
I'm 23 now. And I am not going to lie - I suck at almost all task. Starting from my teens years, I "lost" the ability to read and had to switch to skim - I don't know why, maybe because I have some undiagnosed form of learning disability. But what I know for sure is that my attention span right now is very much fucked up.
And this has affected me a lot - my foundation in whatever I've learnt during my teens is pretty bad. I struggle with advanced trigonometry, I am not able to grasp the concept of limits, calculus and integration is hard to understand, and I also suck at geometrical mathematics, like graphs and cones. I also used to be pretty bad at hydrocarbons, electromagnetism and biology was the only subject I was better at.
Overall, I am a below average student. I barely graduated with a CS degree, obviously without any offer in hand. That was September 2022. I'm still unemployed, struggling with learning software development practices, or completing projects. Joblessness has taken a toll on my mental state - and I'm not sure if this is the recession or just me, but I'm struggling to even get an unpaid internship.
I know that I should be focusing on completing project, but I am trying to read a book on economy for the sake of improving my reading under the hope that if I were to possibly complete my master's degree in the future, I should not struggle with focusing on reading research papers. But I'm struggling with the first page, coming across new word is so distracting and frustrating, because now, I have to do the task of understanding the new word, trying to see how that word makes sense in the passage, while also having to remember the previous context.
I'm not even sure what I should be doing now. I've not spoken to anyone in a long time - well, I did not have anyone to speak to, to begin with. I'm pretending to wear the mask of a clown, but I'm not sure for how long I can keep up with this.
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Need some advice for not socializing so much at work.
I had my annual review at work and the only thing that I need to work on is staying focused and not socializing as much. Apparently I get involved in conversations more than I thought. I can listen to music and stuff, but earbuds make my ears hurt over time and over the ear headphones will drown out too much noise.
I work in IT as a help desk technician. When I'm not working tickets and doing my daily duties, I study for Microsoft certifications that I am required to get.
I'm the first tech in the office and I can get so much done in the 30 mins before others start showing up. At 8:30, my two fave coworkers show up and that's when my focus starts to waver because I love talking to them lol. It doesn't help that they're the people I go to the most when I encounter work that I need help figuring out.
I'm currently on focalin and my dosage is the only dose that doesn't interfere with my heart condition, so I don't want that changed.
I can't really move to another space because of how the office is set up.
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consensus/discussion driven to a fault?
I'm curious if anyone out there reading who lives with ADHD and/or ASD w/executive dysfunction ... when it comes to tasks that aren't just your own but that involve (or are needed by) others, for example household tasks when living with others ... do you find that you actually need consensus and/or discussion on the topic of tasks in order to get them done?
What I'm realizing is that for me, part of executive dysfunction means I don't have the internal watchdog that keeps track of stuff I need to do in relation to others, and just personally speaking I cannot rely on (or be tormented by) guilt as a way to work around the lack of a watchdog.
The one thing that does work for me is talking about it with the people involved, especially if they are people I respect or care about. Either coming to consensus, or at least maintaining shared understanding of the shared space / task list / etc. For some reason, the process of coming to a shared-state perspective on shared effort, and understanding how my responsibilities impact others and at what time others need me to have completed them, is like sprinkling magic pixie dust on the task-item in my brain that allows me to remember it exists at all once it's 5 days later in the week or whatever. I still suck at scheduling and prioritizing and whatnot, but at least I remember the damn task exists and am trying to get it done!
The reason I've figured all this out is kinda grim, long story short I ended up on my ass about 10 years ago, and lost my home about 7 years ago, and then people took me in... and those people don't do the above. They don't discuss things and they don't build consensus or shared state, they just do stuff. And it's utterly and completely paralyzing because I spent the first 3 decades of my life living with people who did discuss things that affect others around them, and now my entire repertoire of human behavior is based on the premise that people attempt to keep each other informed like this, and that's just not the case for a great number of people.
And that process of communication or shared-state rehashing, which I thought all humans engaged in because both my parents did and almost everybody I lived with early in life did, is absolutely critical to wallpapering over my lack of ability to keep track of / remember that tasks exist, especially as my level of overwhelm gets high or my energy gets low.
What really made this sink in was remembering that my dad had endless conflicts with a kid of his from another marriage when he would go to visit, because she also doesn't communicate like this, and just like me, my dad was also absolutely critically dependent on it in order to be able to do anything at all really. In fact that's how I realized that he had a very similar neurological profile to me. In some ways our behavior is starkly alike and now I understand why.
BTW, that dad who almost certainly would be diagnosed with the same dreamy 'primarily inattentive' adult ADHD that I have today, got a Ph.D., retired as a Lt. Colonel in the Air Force, and went on to lead a small college language department and then have a long retirement doing occasional work in advanced linguistics. He later decided to learn Italian, and succeeded, in his 70s. Every time in his life when he had either autonomy and resources to do his own thing, or external structure + social glue that agreed with him, he was able to excel. Without those conditions, he would drift badly and become depressed. Understanding this has helped me understanding myself. My dad was a poor parent in a lot of other ways, but his ability to succeed when he had enough pieces of the puzzle does give me hope.
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Pharmacogenetics Tests
cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ml/post/3731915
> Over the past 2 decades I've been trying various medications to help me w/ my long running major depression & crippling ADHD. And none have seemed to work. > > Recently, the doctor I'm working w/ nowadays suggested that she's practically running out of options to offer me & that I should take a pharmacogenetics test to help her figure out what should she prescribe. > > I took the (expensive) test and the results were eye-opening! The results came out a couple of weeks later w/ a detailed list of some few hundreds medications of various sorts (from pain killers to blood pressure control) along w/ their efficacy for my case. The physician's version also included a list of suggestions and alternatives for each medicine. > > In my particular case, it essentially indicated that any medication that I had tried before was supposed to be either useless or to have limited impact on my body. That part is true. > > Please note that I've only started a new set of prescriptions since a couple of weeks ago and as such can't really vouch for the accuracy of the suggestions. > > I struggled a lot w/ myself to post something this personal. But I thought maybe there are people out there who've got no idea such tests exist and it might turn out to be helpful to some.
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Do any of you maintain hobbies?
I've just graduated college and, as horrible as senior year is, I'm TRULY losing my mind without anything to do. Aside from submitting applications, I'm doing nothing all day and it's wrecking my mental health.
I need to get into a hobby. The problem is I can't stick with anything. I've tried to consistently do things I like, like play guitar, exercise, code games, etcetera dozens of times and nothing sticks. I don't want to waste the effort trying again. I'm on social media and I play too many video games, but those are ultimately making me more depressed.
ADHDers who have hobbies, how do you get into something and not lose all interest the next day or week?
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The ADHD hobby loop visualized
social.beaware.live BeAware :verified_gold: (@[email protected])Attached: 1 image The never ending #ADHD #Hobby loop, visualized. #adhdmemes #memes #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #neurodiverse
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r/ADHD_College is now also on Mander.xyz
mander.xyz ADHD_College - Mander# Welcome to r/c/ADHD_college. We are a community of people with ADHD who are affiliated with higher education. — >We are the official [https://www.reddit.com/r/adhd_college/comments/14jxue6/we_now_have_a_sister_community_on_lemmy/] Lemmy mirror of r/adhd_college [https://www.reddit.com/r/adhd_colle...
cross-posted from: https://mander.xyz/post/882704
> cross-posted from: https://mander.xyz/post/882703 > > > We've made a Lemmy mirror for r/adhd_college. > > > > - [email protected] > > - /c/[email protected] > > - https://www.reddit.com/r/adhd_college/
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ADHD Drug Info - Mad In America
This is a nice summary of ADHD drugs (and how they don’t work).
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On Ritalin and "Hyperactivity Disorder" - Peter R. Breggin, M.D.
FUCK! I HATE THIS COUNTRY!
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ADHD meds are suspiciously over-prescribed.
cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ml/post/330273
> I see ADHD meds constantly being prescribed to people that fit ADHD symptoms; but neurotransmitter levels usually aren't checked prior, which could cause some issues in development. Capitalism is a parasite that values profit over people, so it is unsurprising to find that some people fit ADHD symptoms because the brutality of capitalism exhausted them. > > Artificially inserting neurotransmitters into children can affect their development; health issues could appear as a result.
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ADHD in a nutshell
YouTube Video
Click to view this content.
cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ml/post/279435
> I know this is the autism community but as someone with ASD and ADHD, I thought people here might appreciate this video. There tends to be an overlap between the two.
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Can executive dysfunction affect gameplay?
If it affects your gameplay; how do you deal with it?
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Impulsiveness and risks do not merge well.
I should really stop taking unnecessary risks… oops did it again.
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How do you deal with menial tasks?
The worst menial task I deal with is: Dishes hygiene; I feel like I'm putting in too much effort into washing dishes, and it makes me struggle with doing the task at all.
- I wash a dish repeatedly because I feel like it.
- I try to wash all stains and food off dishes.
EDIT: I also dislike inefficiency, so this would be a good opportunity to improve my methods.
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POV: You're trying to discern depression from ADHD.
I don't feel like doing anything; even things that apparently used to motivate me.
I can't tell if it's depression, ADHD, or me just growing up.
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I forgot that some people tend to be invalidating towards ADHD.
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They also called me a schizophrenic for worrying about surveillance (capitalism). (lol)
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How do I discern hobby burnout and loss of interest.
ADHD makes discerning interesting hobbies difficult for me.
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I wish I didn't have to deal with hygiene (care). : ADHDers
teddit.net I wish I didn't have to deal with hygiene (care). : r/ADHDersHygiene seems so complicated. There is so much misinformation surrounding hygiene (teeth, oral, body, hair, etc). I als
Add earwax management to the list of hygiene routines I hate.
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Do you fear employment?
I already struggle with applying for (US) jobs; ADHD and executive dysfunction
I'm afraid of (worker) abuse; I haven't been taught boundary skills; and I hate change; so I think I would just easily accept the abuse.
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Any tips for adapting to adulthood (ADHD)?
I'm a teenager; but I'm worried about my adulthood future because I don't know (reliably) good methods to adapt to my ADHD (and Autism).
I struggle with working on my projects; even when I take ADHD meds (irregularly now), I still struggle with focus. (The result is unsurprising; ADHD meds are usually assistant tools, not a cure.)
<section><header><h2>My worries.</header></h2><ul> <li><details><summary>I'm in (online) school; but I'm uncertain that I'll even pass it.</summary>
<p>I realize that school (grades) have unlikely chances to make actual impacts in my life; I theoretically could just get a job that doesn't require a degree.</p>
<b>I am more worried about how my family is going to react to me failing out of senior year; I am uncertain if I would be able to interdependently live from them.</b> (Independent living is impossible.)
(I (,only <i>now</i> unfortunately,) recognize that the GED exists, but I think it is far too late to take advantage of it now.)</details></li>
<li>I am willing to accept that this is how I am going to live for the rest of my life; <b><i>if</i> there are no other good techniques for adaption.</b></li> <li>Everything feels boring.</li> <li><details><summary>I don't feel motivated to find a job.</summary> There are alternatives lifestyles that don't require a job: <a href="https://wikipedia.org/wiki/Vagrancy">Vagrancy</a>, <a href="https://wikipedia.org/wiki/Vandwelling">Vandwelling</a>, and <a href="https://wikipedia.org/wiki/Off-the-grid">off-the-grid</a> (are examples).
All of those survival styles seem like a pain though. (I haven't tried actually them.) </li> </ul></section>
NOTE: I am trying to avoid toxic positivity.
EDIT: <section><h2>My solutional management ideas</h2><ul><li>I think futuristically adopting <a href="https://wikipedia.org/wiki/Stoicism">stoic</a> beliefs are not a bad idea; it could help dealing with (future) insecurities that come from ADHD.</section>
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How do you deal with impulsiveness?
Impulses are difficult for people with ADHD to regulate: sexual impulses (like horniness), desperate impulses, financial impulses, etc.
How do you deal with them?