Well, that's certainly an article title isn't it. But I mean it. Microsoft, don't you dare touch Valve. You're fat enough already and too big as it is.
*Valve laughs in Gabe Newell, owner of Valve and former employee of Microsoft.
Motherfucker left Microsoft to focus on games. He spearheaded the move to Linux to protect their store from becoming blocked on Windows. He knows how Microsoft works, intimately.
I’d be really surprised if Valve got sold to Microsoft while Newell still lives.
I sure hope so. But at his weight, people can start having heart problems fairly early. Then again it seems he's lost some in recent years, so maybe he'll get to see old age.