One of the most frustrating conversations with regards to ADHD was with a former coworker. I mentioned something about taking Adderall and he said how he would get some to study and take tests in college. He even said something about how it must be cool to just be able to get good at things while on it. I don't remember the specifics. The idea that someone was taking it just to function normally in everyday life was so foreign to him. I think I did a good job in the moment of gently explaining to him the context that no, I don't take it to try and exceed at work like an athlete might take steroids to do better at sports. He was younger. Too old for it to be okay but hey, maybe that's really all he ever encountered in college was people taking it like that.
Another annoying one was an old highschool friend on Facebook saying how folks with ADHD should utilize their hyper focus as a superpower. I think they said they had ADHD but I can't remember. I really do try to be gentle when explaining these things to people because I know I've had shitty opinions in the past because I hadn't ever heard the right thing to make me rethink stuff. The gist of the post was that you need to learn to live with it by harnessing hyper focus. Sort of an "everyone has a super power" sort of thing. I explained, no, I really don't view this as a super power and would gladly give it up. Hyper focus is rarely a good thing. It's more like tunnel vision. Sure, occasionally the stars align and I get hyper focus on something I need it to be on that's also the current priority I should be working on but that's rare. More often than not it is just totally focusing on some totally unimportant thing and not being able to stop.
Let's compare hyperfocus to an actual super power, like the ability to fly:
"I can fly"
"Oh that's so cool! Can you show me"
"No. I don't get to decide when it starts"
"Oh"
"Or when it stops for that matter. Or even where I'm going"
"That sounds... debilitating"
"Yes"
This is hyperfocus. You can't decide when to hyperfocus. Or when it should stop. Or what you're going to focus on. It is not particularly helpful.
ADHD people should use their hyperfocus for good but unfortunately we live in a capitalist society JANET so we just have to repress the ADHD to handle jobs so we can get money to not die.
The hyperfocus line drives me nuts because if I could do that I wouldn't have a disorder. In fact I would be particularly "ordered" wouldn't I? Hyperfocus but I can control it? Sigh me the fuck up! I get hyperfocused because certain activities trigger a hella sweet dopamine rush that my brain is craving. Unfortunately, I can't control which activities will trigger that reaction, and no amount of self-discipline or willpower will compel my brain to "want" to give me a hit while doing something i find tedious or uninteresting. I can still do stuff I don't want to do, usually... sometimes... ish... but the odds of me falling into a hyperfocal state while doing so are naught.