It’s a really wasteful process too. They use way too much liquid nitrogen. Basically they drip ice cream mix into a bath of liquid, so a lot of nitrogen is lost in the process. They use so much that the company has to have multiple liquid suppliers to fulfill their demand.
Take the juice from one bottle of that Ol' Janx Spirit.
Pour into it one measure of water from the seas of Santraginus V
Allow three cubes of Arcturan Mega-gin to melt into the mixture (it must be properly iced or the benzene is lost).
Allow four litres of Fallian marsh gas to bubble through it (in memory of all those happy Hikers who have died of pleasure in the Marshes of Fallia).
Over the back of a silver spoon float a measure of Qualactin Hypermint extract, redolent of all the heady odours of the dark Qualactin Zones.
Drop in the tooth of an Algolian Suntiger. Watch it dissolve, spreading the fires of the Algolian suns deep into the heart of the drink.
Sprinkle Zamphuor.
Add an olive.
Drink...but very carefully."
Both are from the Pern series. Bubbly pies are just hand pies, basically. Fruit filled and yummy.
Klah is a fictional thing though. It's the bark of a tree native to Pern, so (unlike pies) you can't really have it.
Luckily, Anne McCaffrey allowed the making of a guide to Pern! It's the usual bits of world building of course, but there are several recipes in it, including bubbly pies and a kinda klah. The pies are standard pies of course.
But, klah in the books is described as being similar to coffee, cinnamon and cocoa. The guide book gives a nice recipe for an instant version that's super yummy. But, you can extrapolate from that and brew it instead.
Overall, the best version I've come up with is brewing the coffee with cinnamon and adding cocoa afterward. I tried doing cocoa nibs in the brewing, and it works, but it doesn't really taste right because there's a limit to how much you can add to the grounds, which limits the proportion of chocolate flavor too much.
I use what's called sipping chocolate. It's basically just cocoa powder, some ground chocolate, and sugar. But it's thick and sinful when made by itself. Done as klah, you only use a tablespoon for a full mug of the cinnamon coffe, so it isn't thick at all, it's barely detectable as thicker than regular coffee. But it is a flavor and scent bomb.
There's synergy between those three ingredients anyway, it isn't some kind of new thing. But doing it as a beverage, the scents are so powerful, which makes the experience so much better. You get all the floral notes delivered in the nose as well as across the tongue. The lingering bite of cinnamon and the earthy goodness of the cocoa are amazing of course.
I came here to say klah, and was kinda shocked to find someone else already had, ha. Pern's been such a moribund fandom and hasn't aged well so it feels rare to encounter someone these days. Although I suppose Lemmy is the place for whatever holdouts exist.
But yeah. Klah!
I admit I don't like coffee, so I'd probably want to make a "cultivar" of klah that had less of that, and more chocolate/cinnamon/tea flavor. Like a chai, I guess?
I kind of also want Benden wine...but the thing is, I don't drink and don't much like alcohol, so I imagine I want what I think Robinton experiences when he drinks Benden wine, instead of actual wine.
A good chai with the added cocoa isn't bad at all! You have to go lighter on it, but it is yummy.
I'm not much of a drinker myself, and I'm very particular about wine. But there are grape juices that aren't sweetened. In my head canon, benden would have been similar to a zinfandel, only slightly sweet, but very low tannin, and those unsweetened grape juices are as close to that as you can get to what I've imagined the experience would be.
I'm curious though, why hasn't Pern aged well? I've always found it to be a fun series for the most part. No weird commentary, well balanced characters, solid plot development, and a consistent "vibe". It was one of the better series for female main characters as well, which was very unusual in sci-fi or fantasy when it was started.
A double standard measure of staol and chilled Shungusteriaung warp-wing liver wine bottoming a mouth of white Eflyre-Spin cruchen-spirit in a slush of medium cascalo, topped with roasted weirdberries and served in a number three strength Tipprawlic osmosis-bowl.
Synthahol. It would allow alcoholics to drink as much as they want, then sober up immediately when they need to. Also they wouldn't become alcoholics to begin with, since synthahol isn't actually alcohol and the human body doesn't develop dependency to it. Someone in Europe claims to have invented it already and it is already being sold there! Supposedly it gives you the same effects as alcohol, but only up to 2-3 drinks worth, and then it stops working. The FDA won't approve anything here in the US without tens of thousands of dollars and tons of tests, so we won't see it for a long time, if ever.
Health authorities in Europe are known for being more stringent than the FDA, so that doesn't quite track. Also, the FDA doesn't regulate alcohol in the US. If synthehol is sold and legally recognized as a foodstuff, the manufacturer would only need to show that it's less toxic than Cheetos or Mountain Dew. Or in other words - it's manufactured in clean conditions and has a negligible LD50.
The FDA might regulate a substitute if it were marketed as a treatment for alcoholism... as a medication for a discrete indication. But it's more likely to fall to a regulator like the DEA (or ATF if they want to get really funky). It could result in a strange intersection of regulatory authority - much like the current thing with legalized medicinal and recreational pot.
And honestly - both instances (pot and synthehol) would come down to a fight over who gets the money we spend on getting fucked up on a Friday night. The alcohol industry has got a near monopoly on that at the moment. That's why a lot of the pushback against recreational legalization of pot seems to be coming from the alcohol industry.
A direct alcohol substitute seems like it would be even more in the crosshairs. Prohibition is the obvious option for the current monopoly industry to push for. If lawmakers leave an opening for medicinal use, the next obvious solution is labeling it as a Schedule II drug where the only legal use would be as a treatment for alcoholism (compare: amphetamines for ADHD or morphine for pain). There's probably enough profit in that indication that hundreds of thousands of dollars to pay for trials would be a pittance for any company that wanted to pursue it as a drug. And the alcohol industry would view that as an acceptable loss of customers who were already out the door.