I am fat, balding and have psoriasis, I am 36 years old, have never been in a relationship.
Up untill I was 28 or so I let my insecurities about my looks dictate what I did or didn't do.
But when I realized that the only kind of excersize I have been able to stick with was swimming and started to go regularly, I realized that I should just stop caring and focus on myself, so I did.
I realized that I didn't have the energy to deal with it, I used to try and suck in my gut when at the public pool, but eh, I realized it it better to just act mature and go and deal with it.
I also know how to dress fine, I obviously don't fantastic due to being fat, but I do dress well with long trousers and button down shirts, I have a decent sense of what colours work together (navy blue shirts are allways a good colour, in general, dark and pale colors works for everyone), and that does work great!
I am balding, have been for many years now, and have accepted it, I don't shave my head but I go for a 6mm buzz cut once a month, that is fantastic since it makes going to the barbers increadibly easy!
I have also worn glasses since I went to daycare, and have upgraded my style there as well, I used to go to a cheap optician with decent style frames, but now that I can afford it, I go to a more expensive optician and get frames from Lindbergs and sunglasses from Persol. They look fantastic!
As for my main current concern, my psoriasis, I got it a few years ago, it got treated well with creams, but it never goes away, my doctor prescribed me some pills to deal with it, but I read that they contain stereoids, and once you start with them you can't just quit cold turkey.
That is an absolute no go for me, I am terrified of medicin that can mess with my mind and can't be quit when I want to.
So for the last two years I have simply not dealt with it ofter than trying to be out in the sun when I can.
I was insecure about a lot up until about my last year of college. I didn't really overcome anything directly, but I did find a few things I could be proud of. I was able to look at myself and say I had a few things going for me, and so I began to like myself as a person, which I hadn't been able to say before. I still have most of the stuff I'm insecure about but it just doesn't affect me because I focus on the things I'm proud of.
Once you achieve that inner confidence, I believe it will display itself for others too, and you'll feel like less people notice or think about the things you're insecure about.
thanks for the story, give some insights...
After I moved out from my mom's house insecurities are a piece of cake. My confidencev just sky rocketed.
Before, I didn't realise I was insecure, I though I was normal. I just thought that it was common place to be put down and have everything I do contested because it wasn't done the right way. Now I'm married and I won't fall for these shenanigans.
I got more confidence when I had some professional success and I stopped caring as much what other people think (used to overthink a lot)
