US says UFO sightings likely secret military tests

Researchers say they found "no evidence" that the US government had interactions with aliens.

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No shit sherlock. Some of us have known this for decades.
- Centuries even
  
  Remind me again how long we have had powered flight? Pretty sure it's just over a century. Not sure if plural fits here.
The report lists new technologies that researchers believe led to spikes in UAP reports in the 1950s and 60s. They included high-altitude balloons - one of which inspired waves of UFO speculation when it crashed near Roswell, New Mexico in 1947

oh for fuck’s sake
- Not to mention that relentless "swamp gas"
  
  Dude in the military who runs the swamp gas generator:
  
  Can't get any fuckin respect
Then how do you explain the X-Files then???

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