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Neither of us is*
Found the loophole.
Us is a plural subject, so I believe are is correct.
think of the positive version of the sentence and it becomes more obvious it should be is:
"Either of us is going"
Or, to further stress the point, turn it into a question:
"Is either of us going?"
The subject is not us, it's "either of us", which is singular
Problem is: "Are either of us going" sounds right too.
Either is not always singular - Either the Red Sox or the Yankees are going to win tonight, not Either the Red Sox or the Yankees is going to win.
Fair, didn't think of that. If x or y in "either x or y" is plural, the whole phrase is plural. Either the Red Sox or the Yankees are going to win, either their team or ours is going to win.
Thanks for pointing it out!
It's neither, nor either.