Ah I see. I wouldn't have any recommendations for addressing smell - one shouldn't try to change the smell or taste of a vagina, in particular.

For taste alone, if you've bathed before, the clitoris and penis shouldn't taste much different than any other skin - but maybe you find mouth kissing difficult too? I'm not sure from your original post.

Texture again, shouldn't be too different from other parts of the body, but if you find all of it overwhelming it may just not be very accessible.

Similar to learning what your partner finds enjoyable, over time you might find the pleasurable aspects override the overstimulation. But, my training isn't specific to autism, so you could certainly correct me if you don't find that's true for yourself.

As implied by this observant person, her hips are insane because they're a lie...

Well, nothing very groundbreaking, honestly. Her preference is most any kind of contact with labia (she finds they're not as sensitive), which would mostly include licking (mostly midline, from introitus towards clitoris) or lip to lip, like you're kissing the labia like a mouth.

For direct clitoral simulation she prefers very gentle kissing of it, and eventually gentle licking (either flicking or circular around it) or sucking.

But again, the pace, intensity, pattern is very individual.

I might suggest just looking up oral sex guides and then seeing if any parts of them work for you.

I can't offer an autism perspective, but I will say that figuring out what you like and don't like is a very common issue and unique to each couple.

My own wife does not have autism, but also is extremely sensitive and cannot handle anything but very delicate sensation. Over time we've just figured out through experimenting what works for her. I don't think anyone could have taught us - it was something we had to figure out together.

So, my long reply short: you are right. Try things out and see what works. As long as you are listening to each other you are on the right track.

I'm glad you took the time to respond, even if I'm not sure how many dive into these comments.

I agree completely with you. I read the article and thought, I really don't think anyone in healthcare really truly thinks the diagnoses are simple illnesses with an organic cause anymore. But the frameworks are helpful to direct what treatment options we have/as guidelines.

I find patients themselves want a name for what they're experiencing, even if it is an approximation of what's going on with them.

But at the end of the day, it's no surprise people are depressed, anxious, etc when there are so many fundamentally broken things in the world.

You're right that it's frustrating, but it's a no win situation (I'm a GP myself, btw).

• There aren't enough GPs, there just aren't, so time is scarce. All the surgeries are overloaded.
• each issue NEEDS time. People feel very confident of what they need sometimes, but that isn't how medicine works. We need to assess, get the details, to give a right diagnosis and treatment
• every extra little thing, borrowed minute, carries forward. An extra 10 minutes at every other appointment turns into hours by the end of the day - unacceptable delays for patients and the staff.
• there is so much added paperwork for each of these things. Most of us finish our clinic at 4-5 and then still have a couple of hours of paperwork.
• most of us are so very burnt out at this point, and appointments becoming more complicated, demands getting higher, pushes us further towards giving up.

It isn't the patient's fault, but it is the reality. People fall through the cracks, important things gets missed, we know this and hate it too. We call it moral injury, the phenomenon of building pain because we can't actually meet people's needs or fully do what is right.

I hope the reply is clear that this isn't push back. We wish we had more time with each patient. We wish we didn't need to reign it in, but we're already stretched too thin. We know it's frustrating. We're frustrated too

The discussions were what really made Reddit, to me. I could see an article or piece of information anywhere, but Reddit often had decent commentary that helped add context and perspective.

Wasn't perfect, of course, but in general it felt like it really added to the experience.

Agreed. It feels the same to me as the fighters in Star Wars Squadrons, which is familiar and comfortable.

I can appreciate a goal of realism, but it definitely feels like a hard balancing act with fun. I mean... When I get shot in the game I don't actually die either, haha.

This is a terrific substitute, which I believe everyone could get behind.

This doesn't happen in the movie, but the joke is about a version where Anakin takes the seat that's already occupied by a hologram. It's as if he's sitting in his lap. It's just silly.

I can still remember getting one for Christmas and feeling like an absolute king, sitting in our car riding up to see my grandmother.

Same here, but it's disappointing to see how many people just let it go and pay when enough combined push back would work.