It’s definitely not all bad, there’s some positives that can come out of this. Good for you for doing the work. 👍
You’re right, we’re just being trained to be good little workers. It’s such a sick society… not that work is not important, it is. There’s always a lot to get done. But we’re not working-machines either.
I think you’re right. I tend to think that the White Anglo are the most mentally ill, just because you can tell by looking at a lot of them that something is wrong. They don’t seem healthy mentally. It’s a cold-hearted culture and children need more warmth than what they’re getting. My therapist also said that there’s more mental illness in the Northern climates.
Well that’s the thing, people don’t really understand trauma. When people think of trauma, usually they think of a veteran having trauma from having been through a war, or someone who has physical trauma or trauma from being in a traumatic event like a car accident. But it’s not like that at all… I mean that can also cause trauma but what Gabor says is that the way we live nowadays is very different from the way we evolved, and nowadays a child doesn’t necessarily get a sense of safety and security like they once did. Part of that is because people live more isolated lives, also it can just come from the stress of the parents, which the child picks up on. An anxious mother is enough to cause trauma, or a mother who has a poor sense of boundaries... I wasn’t sexually or physically abused, haven’t had any traumatic event in my life but I was still diagnosed with trauma. My mom just has a poor sense of boundaries, or ‘I think’ that’s what caused it in my case… But I also have anxious parents.
Right? What are we doing if our leaders are mentally ill? Not that anyone is perfectly healthy. But I would think being ‘emotionally shut down’ is a major concern? Someone is making decisions that have a high impact on the population and they can’t even feel empathy? Clearly that doesn’t work. :-/
So sorry to hear that… :( Addictions are very hard to deal with. It hasn’t been a major problem for me but I can imagine… Life can get very dark, I’ve been there. Mindfulness also helped me, as well as doing a lot of healthy reframing. It takes a lot of practice and commitment but it does work. Repressing emotions is very harmful to your health. One thing I practice is just really feeling my feelings, if that makes sense. Gabor Maté talks a lot about that as well, or the impacts of not being authentic, or being a people-pleaser and not knowing how to set boundaries for yourself.
I honestly think life will always be challenging, there’s just ups and downs. But you can definitely improve your life and you can learn how to cope better. If you weren’t blessed with a good health you can get healthier.
I also often felt inadequate, or wasn’t sure what to think of myself. Turns out I was just traumatized… and this has more to do with the system I live than it had to do with me. It’s a helpful realization but also quite dark to contemplate. You’re definitely not alone with all this, even though it can feel that way sometimes, that’s important to remember.
Thanks for the nice wishes! And best of luck to you. Thanks for opening up and sharing your experience, I know it’s not an easy topic. Never give up! ✊
It’s the in-group / out-group sort of thing, if you’re not part of my group, I don’t like you. :-/ https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201012/in-groups-out-groups-and-the-psychology-crowds
I think it’s tribal thinking, it comes from our evolutionary past. A lot of our behaviour has to do with protecting ourselves... Imagine you’re part of a tribe, anyone who looks different / is not part of your tribe is a threat… You need to protect you and your tribe against them.
That’s it really, that’s where it comes from. The world has evolved in a very complex way and now the way we live is very different from the way we’ve evolved. Research has already shown that we hate what is different from us or whoever is not part of our ‘group’ (whatever that is).
The point is that it’s not personal… It has nothing to do with you or something you did, so it is completely unfair. But to be fair often people move to a new culture, don’t make an effort to learn the language or respect the culture and don’t try very hard to integrate. In this case, you’re obviously in the wrong. You need to make more of an effort. But also the bad news is that there probably isn’t much you can do, since this is human nature, it’s hardwired in us. Except trying to integrate yourself in your new culture. Learn the language really well, learn their customs and ways of doing things and respect them. Or maybe there’s an expat community you could be part of? That might be easier. :-/
If you’re being honest with yourself, don’t you hate the Right/Conservatives? :D Isn’t it funny that they’re called the Right when they’re so obviously wrong!? 😅
Well what people need to learn is that there’s no shame in having addictions, it’s really so common these days but people don’t usually talk about it for fear of embarrassement. If people don’t talk about it they won’t realize how common it is… It’s really more of a societal problem at this point. Addictions actually all stem from the same thing, which is trauma, so there’s no addiction that’s worse than another, although some are obviously more harmful. But food and alcohol addictions have become socially acceptable.
I’ve also been diagnosed recently. Before I had difficult symptoms but didn’t know the cause. When I went to see medical doctors they couldn’t find anything wrong with me, yet I wasn’t feeling well and finding it very hard to function.
It is sad that you can’t take care of your health because you’re so busy with other things. :( I’m going to let you in on a trick, it’s very easy, you can easily do this even if you’re busy. It’s an exercise that only takes 10 minutes to practice, a few times per week. It worked amazingly well for me. But keep in mind that it might bring back difficult emotions… I’m not a therapist so I don’t mean to give you medical advice. You might want to buy the book Healing Trauma by Peter Levine, because it’s full of short/easy exercises you can do from home. The exercise I liked is called the tapping or shower exercise. It’s also in his book Waking the Tiger, which has the shorter version. But doing it for 10 minutes is plenty! Somatic Experiencing is a valid therapy method by the way, Peter Levine is a reputable psychologist and not a spiritual guru, just FYI…
Other things that really help me is breath work and the app Curable, for whenever difficult symptoms or emotions come up. I’m happy to help if you have any questions! ☺️
Why wouldn’t it be positive? It brings more awareness to the movement. You’re right, it does take a whole village to raise a child, that’s the problem… people are too isolated nowadays.
Yes, ‘The Myth of Normal’, but didn’t finish reading it yet. I never heard of ‘Hold Onto Your Kids’? But everyone talks about the ‘The Realm of Hungry Ghosts’. :D
People who suffer from mental health issues are very ‘limited’ in how much they can do. When you’re healthier, which is the point of psychedelic therapy, you’re much more capable, more clear-minded… This type of therapy is not to pacify people but to help them heal. So I wouldn’t worry about that, I don’t think it’s a concern. Health is always a good thing. But true that anger can be a good motivator to take action, but being disabled by mental illness is not. It makes you incapable of doing much, you’re just constantly trying to cope with the symptoms you’re dealing with. I think if someone realizes that they’ve been robbed of their life because of mental illness and that the mental illness was caused by the system they live in, there would still be plenty of anger and motivation left to take action. If anything you’d just be much more capable to do so.
I think it’s great that you’re able to apologize and learn from it, we’re all a work in progress! ;) Sometimes we get fed up and over-emotional, we all have bad days…
I believe it… It’s like order and control takes priority, nobody cares about our health and well-being, maybe not even your parents. How can you be healthy when your parents, your employer and your society doesn’t even care about you and your feelings. :-/
How trauma affects the economy
I don’t know if any of you are familiar with Gabor Maté’s work, he’s a well-respected Canadian psychologist and medical doctor. But I feel like some of the things he has to say could definitely support your cause. For one he says that the economy runs on people’s traumas, meaning he believes that trauma, which is common these days (but still not a well-known fact), creates addictions in people. And the reason why people consume so much is because of their addictions. He also points out that it’s the system we live in, which he describes as ‘toxic’, that causes traumas in people (he also says that our system is not at all supportive of mothers).
I can answer questions on trauma if anyone is interested, I’m no expert but somewhat well-informed on the subject or I can at least cover the basics. Or I would recommend reading the book Healing Trauma by Peter Levine which is short and easy, it also comes with exercises you can do from home to heal your own traumas. The documentary The Wisdom of Trauma is also very good.
And this is all science-based information, although I’m not entirely sure what is his own opinion and what is backed by science. But trauma is well-known amongst therapists. The good news is that there’s some relatively easy way for people to heal their traumas or to at least improve their symptoms (trauma can cause all sorts of symptoms). I used a method called Somatic Experiencing and got amazing results. I’m just thinking that this really supports your cause, if people start to become more aware of their traumas and are able to heal them, it could mean that people will have less addictions and therefore will start consuming less and this would affect the economy negatively (or you could say positively). Which creates more incentive to change the system… Also, I think if people become more aware of the fact that the system they live in is toxic to their health in many ways AND even traumatizes their children, I can’t imagine that anyone would want that to continue.
Something else he said is that he thinks that people from the Right are ‘emotionally shut down’. Which means that if someone experiences too much pain they can shut down emotionally, and no longer feel things as a normal, healthy person would. So the question is whether someone who’s in a position of power should be unable to feel empathy? Is this something that should be allowed in our society?
I honestly don’t know much about politics, but want to learn, but I know a little about psychology and I often wonder how what we know about psychology could be applied to politics or how it could be applied to change society in general. I might be wrong, but I’m seeing some huge potential in this type of information.
How this is also very powerful is that people can see more of how their society affects them personally. If it’s affecting your own health and your own children, you’re much more likely to take action and want change than if you’re talking about society and politics. I think for a lot of people that can seem a little more remote or out of reach…
Also if anyone here is struggling with their own addictions, I would encourage you to try Somatic Experiencing to see if it helps. Medical doctors are not trained in emotional trauma, so there’s a chance they would diagnose someone with a medical illness when they’re actually experiencing symptoms caused by trauma.
I wouldn’t mind hearing people’s thoughts on this... I know this information can be somewhat ‘shocking’ when you first hear it. But you’re better off knowing than not knowing, at least you can do something about it. I would suggest looking up Gabor Maté and Peter Levine’s YouTube videos for more information.