okay but seriously is this actually a thing that happens to people? i can't recall ever eating food that made my stomach hurt, closest would be how some junk food makes me feel generally miserable or if i eat so much that i feel like i'm going to explode.
Kinda feels like a lot of people are living with IBS or somesuch and just assume that's normal..
Sometimes when I eat very spicy food, I can get stomach cramps after. I'm not sure why. Other times I'm fine. I love Indian food, especially spicy curries. Maybe I'm not drinking enough water or something beforehand. But as far as I know, I don't have IBS or anything like that.
Cap(saicin) cramps! More water beforehand might help, but I think the only way to really get rid of that response is to condition your body to the level of capsaicin you're putting in it. Even then, if you eat enough it's going to trigger a response.