kachow
kachow
dont be a tryhard nerd heres how to be like lightning
- borrow money from your friends and family until they stop talking to you
- lie to doctors
- use a waterpick instead of flossing
- dont wash your hands unless someones watching
- dont get car maintenance and just crash it when you need a new one
- say uh huh every so often when your wife is talking instead of listening
do you know more tips and tricks to be like lightning if so please share them in the comments
I always keep a tazer on me. Not for self defense, as I'd be more effective using my fists and the knives I keep taped to them, but so that I can literally jolt myself into action at a moment's notice.
Think about it. Do you want to enter a fight unprepared? No! So go shock yourself with a tazer BEFORE it starts.
It's like an activator for my fight response. A button I can push at any time for free adrenaline. When I walk into the DMV I'll give myself a quick jolt to assert dominance over the office clerks. I'm just too powerful, able to summon a breserker rage at the drop of a dine. Man was never meant to wield such power. Sometimes I set it on a timer to keep me on my toes.
These dudes also like the path of least resistance.
looks like a couple of patriots who know how to get quick service
Abso-fucking-lutely they do.
Also a couple of patriots who are scared to leave their house for a burrito or a workout.