When did you feel comfy changing pronouns?
When did you feel comfy changing pronouns?
I've figured out Iwas trans around a year ago. I've more accepted it 6-8 months ago, and fully embraced the identity a few months ago.
I feel like I'm able to see myself as a woman more often(presenting or not; probably the longer hair) but I find it hard to consciously switch names and pronouns since I feel like I still very much present masc¿and don't look so femme, even if I want to.
It's like, it feels somewhat in-genuine, you know? Deep, deep down, I want to be her, but also I don't want the confrontation of, "you don't look like a 'her'."
I just need some advice/encouragement. My therapist has asked multiple times if they should switch name/pronouns, but it's so difficult face-to-face and not socially out.
Help plz?
Edit: I'm not sure how this ended up in the meme community 😅 I posted it late at night, but I thought I got /c/mtf instead
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I didn't really get comfortable with it before changing. I only got used to it a while after changing.
Before and after, there were feelings of guilt, shame, and fear. And the imposter syndrome on top of that.
I would like to encourage you to try with your therapist and if you're privileged enough to have them, trusted friends. Those are helpful spaces to make you more comfortable.
Imposter syndrome! Yes! That's what I'm afraid of. I may have to take my therapist up on that offer. I haven't because I just don't feel fem enough, but I guess, really, lots of people do about various things.
Such a mood. We all feel it from time to time. It's important to remember that your thoughts don't define who you are. I can't count how many times I got hung up on an intrusive thought that spiralled into just straight up attacking and being transphobic to myself. Respecting yourself is tough, but it's possible. Still learning this myself, tbh. Heh. But knowing who you are can take time. Understanding ourselves doesn't happen overnight. ^^
Just remember that it's important to feel comfortable with ones self. We're all gonna experiment here and there with things until we feel most comfortable. We're here for each other, and if you feel like you aren't fem enough than keep on femmin' until it's no longer an argument! Can't argue with straight up facts, gurl. -w- hehe~
I hope you get everything you want and more. 🫂❤️
I've hatched twice now and it's like this for me too: it's been quite important for me to try things out and feel how they feel rather than expecting to figure out my life and self "hands-off" and then implement that once done. Sometimes parts of a presentation or of reactions to it aren't clear until they're felt and one may not necessarily know whether those parts will be pleasant or problems until then. That is, maybe you really don't know how it'll feel until you just jump in and try, give yourself some time to break up some things holding you back, and process the whole reality of it all at once.
Big note: it's okay to be wrong. A lot of people act like it isn't, like everyone's supposed to full-on know without ever thinking about it or having to learn anything, but they're dead wrong and they're probably lying to themselves just to keep from having to consider that maybe identity isn't as simple and easy as they want it to be, or want to pretend that it is.
That all makes perfect sense when it's spelled out 😅 I think I am moving in a similar direction about "just see how it feel" I get so stuck in the head space where I have to figure out all I can before I make a move, and my therapist has been trying to get me out of that for a while, because it doesn't work like that 😂