More like: Johnny says he’ll be here at three. Johnny shows up at 3:25. Kid is pissed he wasn’t there at 3.
Or: Hey, we might go out for pizza next Friday. Kid hears Friday=Pizza, and gets pissed because some other thing got in the way of pizza and didn’t hear the “might” part.
Nobody lied with the intent to deceive or mislead. Just life happens.
On the contrary. Some people are wired in such a way that shifting gears is hard, and hyper focusing on the expectation that someone will show up at a specific time, or hyper-focusing on pizza in my made up situation, and doesn’t can be really difficult to deal with as a kid who can’t emotionally deal with that. ADHD has a lot of variety and tangential fallout that you might not really think of.
But for kids without ADHD it doesn't generally present the massive obstacle in their social life that it frequently presents for kids with ADHD. It can be an even daily issue with stronger emotions with ADHD and can really make socializing really hard for younglings.
Kids who have ADHD may take things like that significantly more seriously or be far more impacted by that sort of stuff.
It's like with some of the other symptoms of ADHD that most people think "everyone deals with". Everyone forgets stuff and has trouble staying on track occasionally, but it's not typical for it to be so frequent and bad that it constantly interferes multiple times an hour with daily life and royally screws up important moments in your life.
Ugh. Yeah, that sounds familiar. Never seen people send themselves down that cycle so hard. Get punished, unable to let go of the anger, get told to stop or more punishment, I don’t fucking care punish me, gets more punishment.
Sucks if you don’t understand it. People just need to be told to fuck off and cool down, then you can deal with it. In the heat of the problem ADHD makes it so much worse.