I have ADHD, a trauma disorder and anxiety in a family of conservatives so let me lay out what that's like: ADHD is seen as immaturity/laziness, men with anxiety are seen as weak/not masculine and trauma disorders you're basically thought of as being a pussy. I deal with it by not associating with all but a couple of them that I determined were people I could trust.
I was diagnosed with all 3 when I was 32 in my last semester of college. So for 30 years I basically hated myself due to a lot of that stigma being internalized. I did not have to just fight the stigma from other people but my own self hatred.
I feel like my brother has been on similar shit with internalizing self hatred to the point where he has like a complete inability to see himself as a person. I keep trying to push him to go to therapy despite his constant refusal — can I ask, what happened for things to change for you / what caused you to get diagnosed? (you don’t have to go into detail of course)
I went to therapy because it felt like my life was crumbling and I felt hopeless. After a year of therapy my therapist told me to get assessed for ADHD and after a several month wait, I was formally diagnosed with primarily inattentive ADHD. I was reasonably intelligent as a kid (which helped mask it) and wasn't hyperactive or disruptive so no one really cared to assess me for it.