Basic American etiquette
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It goes on whichever side your dominant hand is. Also, in the picture it's flipped the wrong way: Handle goes out so you can pick it up easily for when you need to dispense freedom seeds.
Also^2, the coffee should be black.
I was gonna upvote you for the first paragraph, but had to rescind it for the second.
Black coffee best coffee and I'll stand by that statement.
I assume you eat dry cereal without milk too, like an serial killer.
Nope, milk is fine in cereal.
Coffee black. Cereal with yogurt or heavy cream.