If you figure out the motivation thing, give me buzz. For winding down, I found that doing mindless sorting tasks is good for relaxing. For instance, I build LEGO things, my son plays with them and takes them apart eventually, and I sort them back out. One time, I went through my son's old clothes and made a list of what was in each box. I felt so relaxed after the clothes logging! It was a nice little Saturday!
We are wired differently. "Winding down" doesn't look the same for us. It's just hard to find the right task to let our brains relax.
Yeah, meds have helped, in my case. At least benzos, but I try not to use them since they were explicitly prescribed as a last resort. I gotta book an appointment at a second doctor one of these days... It wasn't really working out with my previous doctor.