currently in bay area. quit 10 months ago because of health reasons. 110% better now, thank goodness
i've mostly done lifecycle software engineering for the last 10 years (python c++ javascript). I rarely got to develop features; happened a couple times in the last year. I enjoyed bug fixing but it's such a rare position to find. i've gotten a few interviews, more coming.
i've never gotten a job through a referral. i don't really know anybody but going to meetups is on the agenda. does meetup.com even work anymore? not sure how that works, tho...social anxiety+cptsd+autism makes it so difficult.
how do you even find 'mentors' ? no one has ever helped me like that, it's inconceivable.
I've been grinding leetcode more, and am getting better ( dont have to look at answers as much), studying SD question/answers. working on side projects that are technical enough
But i'm so scared i wont ever find another job. im thinking of just going to trucking school, but i like software a lot.
With your background, consider pivoting into another skill subset. Specifically, the Salesforce job market has been completely flooded with people who don't have a baseline understanding of code and coding best principles and practices.
People that I work with that understand those, get really far in the Salesforce ecosystem. Having a solid background in those OOP languages would help you really shine in that market.
It's a skill set that's needed and for you, will be relatively easy to go into, just go out and pay $200 to get your admin cert and another two to get your SF Dev 1 Cert. The Apex language is just a flavor of Java and LWC is just JavaScript. You'll then get a ton of recruiters reaching out.
Whatever you decide though, good luck and keep at it! It took me over a decade of bouncing around different niche IT areas before I found something that stuck.
Source for my opinions: I'm currently working as a Senior Enterprise Architect at one of the big 4 consulting firms and have been for years.